1
00:00:02,002 --> 00:00:03,378
<i>♪ [new wave]</i>

2
00:00:20,270 --> 00:00:24,149
<i>♪ Well, you might
think I'm crazy ♪</i>

3
00:00:24,274 --> 00:00:28,070
<i>♪ To hang around
with you ♪</i>

4
00:00:28,195 --> 00:00:31,532
<i>♪ Or maybe you think
I'm lucky ♪</i>

5
00:00:31,657 --> 00:00:35,035
<i>♪ To have
something to do ♪</i>

6
00:00:35,160 --> 00:00:38,747
<i>♪ But I think
that you're wild ♪</i>

7
00:00:38,872 --> 00:00:42,251
<i>♪ Inside me
is some child ♪</i>

8
00:00:42,376 --> 00:00:46,088
<i>♪ You might think
I'm foolish ♪</i>

9
00:00:46,213 --> 00:00:49,633
<i>♪ Or maybe
it's untrue ♪</i>

10
00:00:49,758 --> 00:00:51,844
<i>♪ You might think
I'm crazy ♪</i>

11
00:00:51,969 --> 00:00:54,263
- [all] Ooh!
- All right, Kent!

12
00:00:55,681 --> 00:00:56,849
Go, Hayley.

13
00:00:56,974 --> 00:00:57,933
Seven minutes.

14
00:00:58,058 --> 00:00:59,935
Go get 'em, cowboy.

15
00:01:00,060 --> 00:01:01,937
See you
in seven minutes.

16
00:01:05,524 --> 00:01:07,651
Stu, run it by me again.

17
00:01:07,776 --> 00:01:09,152
Kissing is first base.

18
00:01:09,278 --> 00:01:10,779
Second base is boob.

19
00:01:10,904 --> 00:01:12,239
Third base is--
Finger.

20
00:01:12,364 --> 00:01:13,574
Finger?

21
00:01:13,699 --> 00:01:14,825
Or thumb.

22
00:01:14,950 --> 00:01:15,993
Okay.

23
00:01:16,118 --> 00:01:18,620
Charlie, trust me.

24
00:01:18,745 --> 00:01:20,998
Second base is what
it's all about.

25
00:01:21,123 --> 00:01:22,666
I'm all about
the boobies.

26
00:01:22,791 --> 00:01:25,043
Okay.
Anything else?

27
00:01:25,169 --> 00:01:27,671
An intentional walk
is a kiss on the cheek.

28
00:01:27,796 --> 00:01:29,965
An inside park home run
is a blow job.

29
00:01:30,090 --> 00:01:31,216
What's a blow job?

30
00:01:31,341 --> 00:01:33,010
I have no idea,

31
00:01:33,135 --> 00:01:34,469
but I overheard
my dad saying

32
00:01:34,595 --> 00:01:36,388
that he gets one
once a year on
his birthday.

33
00:01:36,513 --> 00:01:37,973
So it must be good.

34
00:01:46,190 --> 00:01:48,066
<i>♪ Physical, physical ♪</i>

35
00:01:48,192 --> 00:01:49,818
<i>♪ I want to get physical ♪</i>

36
00:01:49,943 --> 00:01:51,028
Bleah!
Ugh!

37
00:01:51,153 --> 00:01:52,446
Yeah!

38
00:01:52,571 --> 00:01:54,281
You, me.

39
00:01:54,406 --> 00:01:55,449
Closet.

40
00:01:55,574 --> 00:01:56,909
Seven minutes.

41
00:01:57,034 --> 00:01:57,910
Heaven.

42
00:01:58,035 --> 00:02:00,495
Ohh...
He's so gross.

43
00:02:00,621 --> 00:02:03,040
<i>♪ Let's get physical,
physical ♪</i>

44
00:02:03,165 --> 00:02:04,333
Sorry, Jennifer.

45
00:02:04,458 --> 00:02:06,919
<i>♪ I want to get physical ♪</i>

46
00:02:07,044 --> 00:02:09,046
<i>♪ Let's get into physical ♪</i>

47
00:02:12,174 --> 00:02:13,800
- [slap]
- Stop.

48
00:02:13,926 --> 00:02:15,052
Don't touch me.

49
00:02:15,177 --> 00:02:16,553
Stand on that side
of the closet,

50
00:02:16,678 --> 00:02:17,971
and I'll say we kissed.

51
00:02:18,096 --> 00:02:20,891
I will... if you say
we did the nasty.

52
00:02:21,016 --> 00:02:23,936
No.
I'll say we kissed.

53
00:02:24,061 --> 00:02:26,063
Say I touched
your boobies.

54
00:02:26,188 --> 00:02:29,066
No!
I'll say we kissed.

55
00:02:29,191 --> 00:02:31,068
Okay.

56
00:02:31,193 --> 00:02:32,819
I kissed your boobies.

57
00:02:32,945 --> 00:02:35,239
[slurping, kissing]

58
00:02:36,448 --> 00:02:39,910
<i>♪ I want to know
what love is ♪</i>

59
00:02:42,246 --> 00:02:46,250
<i>♪ I want you to show me ♪</i>

60
00:02:48,544 --> 00:02:51,255
<i>♪ I want to feel
what love is ♪</i>

61
00:02:55,717 --> 00:02:57,261
Ohh!
Anisha!

62
00:03:04,226 --> 00:03:06,353
Stop staring.
You're freaking me out.

63
00:03:06,478 --> 00:03:08,939
I'm looking at you
'cause I like you,
Charlie.

64
00:03:09,064 --> 00:03:10,274
It's okay.

65
00:03:10,399 --> 00:03:12,109
Come on. You can
do what you want.

66
00:03:12,234 --> 00:03:14,945
That's okay.
I'm kind of new at this.

67
00:03:15,070 --> 00:03:16,280
Let me see your penis.

68
00:03:18,031 --> 00:03:21,118
What's the matter?
Don't you want me?

69
00:03:21,243 --> 00:03:22,953
[Charlie]
Oh, my God!

70
00:03:23,078 --> 00:03:24,538
That's my boy.

71
00:03:24,663 --> 00:03:26,748
He's probably
blow-jobbing her.

72
00:03:28,542 --> 00:03:30,752
[kissing]

73
00:03:32,254 --> 00:03:34,923
Anisha!
Ah, I can't breathe!

74
00:03:35,048 --> 00:03:36,133
I love you, Charlie.

75
00:03:36,258 --> 00:03:37,676
I've loved you
since the third grade.

76
00:03:37,801 --> 00:03:38,969
Um, thank you?

77
00:03:39,094 --> 00:03:40,596
So you like to play
hard to get.

78
00:03:40,721 --> 00:03:42,806
Oh! Back off!

79
00:03:42,931 --> 00:03:44,308
I've read
in my mom's <i>Cosmo</i>

80
00:03:44,433 --> 00:03:46,685
this is supposed
to increase pleasure.

81
00:03:46,810 --> 00:03:48,604
Ow!

82
00:03:48,729 --> 00:03:50,814
Don't worry. This is
my first time, too.

83
00:03:50,939 --> 00:03:52,941
First time what, killing?

84
00:03:53,066 --> 00:03:54,359
No, Charlie.
Making love.

85
00:03:54,484 --> 00:03:56,111
Ow!

86
00:03:56,236 --> 00:04:00,073
Get off me,
you freak! Aah!

87
00:04:03,535 --> 00:04:06,455
Charlie Logan, you are not
my boyfriend anymore.

88
00:04:06,580 --> 00:04:07,623
I hex you!

89
00:04:07,748 --> 00:04:09,041
You what?

90
00:04:09,166 --> 00:04:12,252
I hex you.
You will never be happy.

91
00:04:13,879 --> 00:04:16,173
Around you love will fall
like rain.

92
00:04:16,298 --> 00:04:19,009
But you won't hold it.
Your heart will pain!

93
00:04:19,134 --> 00:04:21,178
Once the girl
has been with you,

94
00:04:21,303 --> 00:04:23,222
to the next
she will be true!

95
00:04:23,347 --> 00:04:24,932
[distant thunderclap]

96
00:04:25,057 --> 00:04:26,558
Was that Phil Collins?

97
00:04:28,310 --> 00:04:30,354
Ow! Ohh!

98
00:04:34,149 --> 00:04:35,651
What happened?

99
00:04:35,776 --> 00:04:37,361
Did you thumb her?

100
00:04:51,333 --> 00:04:53,961
Charlie,
we could get arrested
for public indecency.

101
00:04:54,086 --> 00:04:55,587
I like the way
you think.

102
00:05:04,304 --> 00:05:05,764
[unzipping]

103
00:05:05,889 --> 00:05:10,477
Grr!

104
00:05:10,602 --> 00:05:12,396
Grr!
O-kay.

105
00:05:14,189 --> 00:05:15,399
Hipe!

106
00:05:17,526 --> 00:05:19,403
Hah--

107
00:05:19,528 --> 00:05:21,321
- All right!
- I love you.

108
00:05:21,446 --> 00:05:24,741
Oh, my--
Oh, my God, Carol.

109
00:05:24,867 --> 00:05:26,285
I love you, Charlie.

110
00:05:26,410 --> 00:05:27,244
Oh, that's nice.

111
00:05:29,371 --> 00:05:31,248
"That's nice"?

112
00:05:31,373 --> 00:05:33,250
I'm licking the sand
off your balls,

113
00:05:33,375 --> 00:05:34,501
and you say
"That's nice"?

114
00:05:34,626 --> 00:05:36,837
No, I said,
"Oh, my God" to that.

115
00:05:36,962 --> 00:05:38,881
I said "Oh, my God"
very enthusiastically

116
00:05:39,006 --> 00:05:40,340
about the ball lick.

117
00:05:40,465 --> 00:05:42,843
Hey, listen, I'm sorry.

118
00:05:42,968 --> 00:05:45,470
I just don't think
the "L" word should be
thrown around casually.

119
00:05:45,596 --> 00:05:46,930
[scoffs]

120
00:05:47,055 --> 00:05:49,516
The "L" word?
What are you, eight?

121
00:05:49,641 --> 00:05:52,352
How about the "F" word
and the "you" word?

122
00:06:09,661 --> 00:06:14,291
I can't believe
you and Carol
went belly-up, man.

123
00:06:14,416 --> 00:06:15,709
She was so into you.

124
00:06:15,834 --> 00:06:18,462
Yeah, well, she was
a, uh, noisy eater.

125
00:06:20,422 --> 00:06:22,925
It's that word, Stu:
love.

126
00:06:23,050 --> 00:06:25,552
I wanted to say it,
but I just-- I couldn't.

127
00:06:25,677 --> 00:06:27,679
How can I say something
if I don't feel it?

128
00:06:27,804 --> 00:06:29,890
Easy. Lie.

129
00:06:30,015 --> 00:06:31,934
What do you think
all relationships
are based on, man?

130
00:06:32,059 --> 00:06:33,602
Lies.

131
00:06:33,727 --> 00:06:36,104
"No, honey, your ass
looks great in those jeans."

132
00:06:36,230 --> 00:06:39,066
"Honey,
I love your parents."

133
00:06:39,191 --> 00:06:41,151
"You're kidding me.
That sore right there?
That's not herpes."

134
00:06:41,276 --> 00:06:42,611
You know what I'm saying?

135
00:06:42,736 --> 00:06:44,905
So, then, who are you
taking to Katie's wedding?

136
00:06:45,030 --> 00:06:46,907
Oh, I don't know.
You want to go?

137
00:06:47,032 --> 00:06:48,325
Do bridesmaids give head
in the coat room?

138
00:06:48,450 --> 00:06:51,495
Of course I want to go!
Ha ha.

139
00:06:51,620 --> 00:06:54,331
You know how easy it is
to score at a wedding?

140
00:06:54,456 --> 00:06:56,917
Have you ever scored
at a wedding?

141
00:06:57,042 --> 00:06:58,794
Pacing myself.

142
00:06:58,919 --> 00:07:00,337
Must be weird.

143
00:07:00,462 --> 00:07:02,339
You were dating Katie
six months ago,

144
00:07:02,464 --> 00:07:03,799
and now she's
marrying a doctor.

145
00:07:03,924 --> 00:07:05,384
I'm a doctor.

146
00:07:05,509 --> 00:07:07,636
He's a heart surgeon.
You're a dentist.

147
00:07:07,761 --> 00:07:09,638
It's like saying
General Patton
and Colonel Mustard

148
00:07:09,763 --> 00:07:11,139
are both military men.

149
00:07:11,265 --> 00:07:13,141
Hi, Dr. Stu.

150
00:07:13,267 --> 00:07:14,309
Natalie.

151
00:07:20,315 --> 00:07:23,235
I jerk off
to her mammograms.

152
00:07:23,360 --> 00:07:25,445
God, I love my job.

153
00:07:25,571 --> 00:07:27,364
Every day,
it's like Christmas.

154
00:07:27,489 --> 00:07:28,907
Who are you
working over today?

155
00:07:33,620 --> 00:07:35,372
Dr. Charlie,
you're five minutes late!

156
00:07:35,497 --> 00:07:37,207
You've got four fillings,
three cleanings,

157
00:07:37,332 --> 00:07:38,625
two crowns, and a canal.

158
00:07:38,750 --> 00:07:40,419
You've got
too many patients,

159
00:07:40,544 --> 00:07:42,212
and I've got
too little patience

160
00:07:42,337 --> 00:07:43,422
for you to be gabbing gossip

161
00:07:43,547 --> 00:07:45,382
with Dr. Boob Jobs
in the hallway.

162
00:07:45,507 --> 00:07:47,259
How are you today,
Reba?

163
00:07:47,384 --> 00:07:49,219
Were you just
looking at my tits?

164
00:07:49,344 --> 00:07:50,554
Because I am more than happy

165
00:07:50,679 --> 00:07:52,389
with what the Lord Almighty
gave me.

166
00:07:52,514 --> 00:07:54,016
I wasn't looking
at your--
Shh!

167
00:07:54,141 --> 00:07:56,393
Come on, Dr. Charlie.

168
00:08:02,024 --> 00:08:03,400
[Man]
♪ Oo-ooh ♪

169
00:08:03,525 --> 00:08:05,819
♪ Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah ♪

170
00:08:05,944 --> 00:08:10,657
♪ I don't want
anybody else ♪

171
00:08:10,782 --> 00:08:14,411
♪ When I think about you,
I rub myself ♪

172
00:08:14,536 --> 00:08:18,916
♪ I don't want
anybody else ♪

173
00:08:19,041 --> 00:08:23,712
♪ When I think about you,
I touch myself ♪

174
00:08:23,837 --> 00:08:25,422
♪ You are what-- ♪

175
00:08:25,547 --> 00:08:26,715
Okay, you're my wingman.

176
00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:28,675
If the blonde asks,

177
00:08:28,800 --> 00:08:31,094
I'm the billionaire
who invented string cheese.

178
00:08:31,220 --> 00:08:32,513
If it's that redhead,

179
00:08:32,638 --> 00:08:34,515
tell her I wrote
"We Are the World."

180
00:08:34,640 --> 00:08:36,683
And, uh, if it's
that cheerleader
hottie over there,

181
00:08:36,808 --> 00:08:38,810
my penis is in
the <i>Guinness Book
of World Records:</i>

182
00:08:38,936 --> 00:08:40,312
girth, not length.

183
00:08:40,437 --> 00:08:41,522
I want it
to sound believable.

184
00:08:41,647 --> 00:08:43,357
Holy shit.

185
00:08:46,568 --> 00:08:48,195
Activate pelvis.

186
00:08:48,320 --> 00:08:51,240
[imitates robot]

187
00:08:58,789 --> 00:09:01,875
Yo, yo, yo, hold on
to your pantyhose.

188
00:09:02,000 --> 00:09:04,461
The hostess
with the mostest

189
00:09:04,586 --> 00:09:06,088
has got a toastess.

190
00:09:12,845 --> 00:09:15,305
I just want
to thank everybody

191
00:09:15,430 --> 00:09:17,558
for coming to share
this day with us.

192
00:09:17,683 --> 00:09:19,351
I couldn't imagine
being any happier

193
00:09:19,476 --> 00:09:20,853
than I am right now.

194
00:09:20,978 --> 00:09:22,771
Wait till tonight, sweetheart.

195
00:09:24,606 --> 00:09:25,983
I know it's
a little unorthodox,

196
00:09:26,108 --> 00:09:28,819
but I'd also like
to propose a toast...

197
00:09:30,988 --> 00:09:32,739
to Charlie Logan.

198
00:09:32,865 --> 00:09:37,494
Thank you, Charlie,
for being my lucky charm.

199
00:09:37,619 --> 00:09:38,537
To Charlie!

200
00:09:38,662 --> 00:09:40,497
To Charlie.
To Charlie.

201
00:09:46,128 --> 00:09:48,130
So, you're that Charlie?

202
00:09:48,255 --> 00:09:49,506
What Charlie?

203
00:09:49,631 --> 00:09:52,843
You know, Charlie,
the-- the dentist.

204
00:10:18,535 --> 00:10:20,537
Oh! I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.

205
00:10:20,662 --> 00:10:22,331
- Oh, no. Are you okay?
- That's horrible!

206
00:10:22,456 --> 00:10:24,374
- I'm all right.
- I didn't-- I didn't mean to.

207
00:10:24,499 --> 00:10:26,585
Sorry about that.

208
00:10:26,710 --> 00:10:27,920
Oh, jeez.

209
00:10:28,045 --> 00:10:29,546
Here you go.

210
00:10:29,671 --> 00:10:30,964
Thanks.
Sure.

211
00:10:31,089 --> 00:10:32,716
Oh. There I am.

212
00:10:34,092 --> 00:10:35,719
Join us.

213
00:10:37,346 --> 00:10:39,556
So, what did I miss?

214
00:10:39,681 --> 00:10:40,807
Uh, not much.

215
00:10:40,933 --> 00:10:42,643
Same old--
Uh, I do, I do.

216
00:10:42,768 --> 00:10:44,228
"You may
kiss the bride."

217
00:10:44,353 --> 00:10:46,271
White cake
with raspberry filling,

218
00:10:46,396 --> 00:10:47,856
and the doves
being released,

219
00:10:47,981 --> 00:10:50,734
but the doves
refuse to leave.

220
00:10:52,778 --> 00:10:55,239
I'm Cam. I went
to college with the bride.

221
00:10:55,364 --> 00:10:57,533
I'm Charlie.
I used to date the bride.

222
00:10:57,658 --> 00:10:58,742
Me, too.

223
00:11:00,410 --> 00:11:02,829
Well, no. I mean,
it was a one-time-only

224
00:11:02,955 --> 00:11:04,373
experimental thing,
sophomore year.

225
00:11:04,498 --> 00:11:06,708
We were young.
And drunk.

226
00:11:08,961 --> 00:11:13,423
[Woman singing loudly
off-key]

227
00:11:13,549 --> 00:11:16,009
Is this person
being dipped in acid?

228
00:11:16,134 --> 00:11:19,263
Waiter, could we
have some chloroform
for the singer?

229
00:11:19,388 --> 00:11:21,515
What are you
going to sing?

230
00:11:21,640 --> 00:11:23,851
I'm thinking about
doing Bon Jovi
"Livin' On a Prayer."

231
00:11:23,976 --> 00:11:25,227
Really?
That's the one
I was going to do.

232
00:11:25,352 --> 00:11:26,770
- Oh, really?
- No.

233
00:11:30,190 --> 00:11:32,067
So, Cam, what do you do?

234
00:11:32,192 --> 00:11:34,736
I run the Penguin Habitat
at Aqua World.

235
00:11:35,821 --> 00:11:37,531
Seriously,
what do you do?

236
00:11:38,740 --> 00:11:39,616
Seriously?
Yeah.

237
00:11:39,741 --> 00:11:41,076
I'm a serial killer.

238
00:11:41,201 --> 00:11:43,078
My passion is killing people
I meet at weddings.

239
00:11:43,203 --> 00:11:44,079
What do you do?

240
00:11:44,204 --> 00:11:46,623
FBI. You're under arrest.

241
00:11:46,748 --> 00:11:48,625
Your run is over,
Miss "Wexler,"

242
00:11:48,750 --> 00:11:50,794
if that's your real name.

243
00:11:52,629 --> 00:11:54,715
Actually, I am a dentist.

244
00:11:54,840 --> 00:11:56,049
You're a dentist?

245
00:11:56,175 --> 00:11:58,177
You'll love me.
Perfect teeth. No cavities.

246
00:11:58,302 --> 00:11:59,636
Want to see?

247
00:11:59,761 --> 00:12:00,637
Aah!

248
00:12:00,762 --> 00:12:02,431
Oh! My legs! My legs!

249
00:12:02,556 --> 00:12:03,432
I'm sorry.

250
00:12:03,557 --> 00:12:04,433
[screaming]

251
00:12:04,558 --> 00:12:05,809
Water!

252
00:12:06,977 --> 00:12:08,270
Oh, no!

253
00:12:08,395 --> 00:12:09,813
I'm sorry.

254
00:12:10,772 --> 00:12:12,816
I'll just get in there
and--

255
00:12:15,527 --> 00:12:17,279
Wait.
Let me see, let me see.

256
00:12:17,404 --> 00:12:19,281
- Thanks.
- It looks like cum!

257
00:12:19,406 --> 00:12:21,033
It looks like cum.

258
00:12:21,158 --> 00:12:22,659
Well, here I am.

259
00:12:22,784 --> 00:12:24,286
What are your other
two wishes?

260
00:12:25,787 --> 00:12:28,081
Stu, Cam. Cam, Stu.

261
00:12:28,207 --> 00:12:29,082
Hi.
Hi.

262
00:12:29,208 --> 00:12:31,668
It's actually
Doctor Stu.

263
00:12:31,793 --> 00:12:33,170
I'm a reconstructive
surgeon.

264
00:12:33,295 --> 00:12:34,588
If anyone
has an accident

265
00:12:34,713 --> 00:12:35,881
or is born
with a deformity,

266
00:12:36,006 --> 00:12:37,466
I'm there to help.

267
00:12:37,591 --> 00:12:38,675
And by deformity,

268
00:12:38,800 --> 00:12:39,676
he means
small breasts.

269
00:12:39,801 --> 00:12:41,345
Ow.

270
00:12:41,470 --> 00:12:42,930
He is just jealous

271
00:12:43,055 --> 00:12:45,098
because he has to clean
plaque all day long

272
00:12:45,224 --> 00:12:46,767
while I'm out
making the world
a better place.

273
00:12:48,393 --> 00:12:50,687
Cam, you will not
believe this doofus

274
00:12:50,812 --> 00:12:52,689
that just tried
to pick me up.

275
00:12:52,814 --> 00:12:53,857
Oh. Hi.

276
00:12:53,982 --> 00:12:55,108
Hi.

277
00:12:55,234 --> 00:12:56,276
- Again.
- Yeah.

278
00:12:56,401 --> 00:12:57,861
Yeah.

279
00:12:58,820 --> 00:13:00,155
I got to go.

280
00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:01,865
Nice to meet you.

281
00:13:02,991 --> 00:13:04,076
Tits and teeth.

282
00:13:07,621 --> 00:13:10,165
I don't think
she was into me.

283
00:13:10,290 --> 00:13:12,876
Say, uh, ladies--

284
00:13:14,837 --> 00:13:15,712
Hey, you.

285
00:13:15,838 --> 00:13:17,589
- Hey.
- [knife clatters]

286
00:13:17,714 --> 00:13:19,091
- You look great.
- Thank you.

287
00:13:19,216 --> 00:13:20,717
So do you.

288
00:13:20,843 --> 00:13:22,928
So, how are you
and Carol doing?

289
00:13:24,179 --> 00:13:25,347
We're--

290
00:13:27,474 --> 00:13:31,228
We're just giving each other
a little space right now.

291
00:13:31,353 --> 00:13:33,814
I worry about you
sometimes, Chuck.

292
00:13:33,939 --> 00:13:36,400
Always a bridesmaid,
never a bride.

293
00:13:36,525 --> 00:13:38,026
It's better
to have loved and lost

294
00:13:38,151 --> 00:13:40,070
than to have never
loved at all.

295
00:13:40,195 --> 00:13:43,991
I'll buy that when you
can honestly tell me
that you have loved.

296
00:13:44,116 --> 00:13:45,534
Touché.

297
00:13:47,744 --> 00:13:49,538
I just want to see you
happy, Chuckles.

298
00:13:51,540 --> 00:13:53,834
Attention, hot mamas.

299
00:13:53,959 --> 00:13:55,752
Can we have all
the single ladies

300
00:13:55,878 --> 00:13:56,920
out on the terrace

301
00:13:57,045 --> 00:13:58,589
for the tossing
of the bride's bouquet?

302
00:13:58,714 --> 00:13:59,923
See you.

303
00:14:07,890 --> 00:14:09,016
Ready, ladies?

304
00:14:09,141 --> 00:14:11,768
One!

305
00:14:11,894 --> 00:14:14,062
Two!

306
00:14:14,188 --> 00:14:15,898
Three!

307
00:14:19,776 --> 00:14:22,863
[girl screaming]

308
00:14:35,709 --> 00:14:36,585
Morning, Reba.

309
00:14:36,710 --> 00:14:38,128
Good morning,
Dr. Logan.

310
00:14:39,922 --> 00:14:42,299
Good morning, Doctor.

311
00:14:42,424 --> 00:14:44,134
I think
I have a cavity.

312
00:14:44,259 --> 00:14:45,969
Me, too.

313
00:15:20,754 --> 00:15:22,840
- Hey, Sharon. Is Stu in?
- Hi.

314
00:15:22,965 --> 00:15:25,342
Sharon-- Oh, Dr. Logan.

315
00:15:25,467 --> 00:15:27,553
Can you come back here
for a second, please?

316
00:15:34,268 --> 00:15:35,727
Oh, I'm sorry.

317
00:15:35,853 --> 00:15:37,855
Wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait.
We need you.

318
00:15:37,980 --> 00:15:39,815
Dr. Logan--

319
00:15:39,940 --> 00:15:41,358
Hmm.

320
00:15:41,483 --> 00:15:42,860
This is Pleasure.

321
00:15:42,985 --> 00:15:44,278
Nice to meet you.

322
00:15:44,403 --> 00:15:46,154
The pleasure's all mine.

323
00:15:46,280 --> 00:15:47,865
Get it?

324
00:15:47,990 --> 00:15:49,616
"The pleasure's all mine"?

325
00:15:49,741 --> 00:15:51,702
My name is Pleasure.

326
00:15:51,827 --> 00:15:56,331
That is...
enormously clever.

327
00:15:56,456 --> 00:15:57,875
[laughter]

328
00:15:58,000 --> 00:15:59,543
We need
a second opinion.

329
00:15:59,668 --> 00:16:01,879
What do you think?

330
00:16:02,004 --> 00:16:04,506
Are they even?

331
00:16:04,631 --> 00:16:07,134
- So you knew they were even.
- Of course they were even.
I did them.

332
00:16:07,259 --> 00:16:09,178
I just wanted you to see them
without having to pay
for a lap dance.

333
00:16:09,303 --> 00:16:10,888
How did you get a license
to practice medicine?

334
00:16:11,013 --> 00:16:14,016
You need a license?

335
00:16:14,141 --> 00:16:17,686
Listen, have you noticed
anything different about me?

336
00:16:17,811 --> 00:16:20,898
Other than your
aversion to fantastic,
gigantic titties?

337
00:16:21,023 --> 00:16:23,901
Women seem to be
coming on to me

338
00:16:24,026 --> 00:16:25,903
in an unusual manner.

339
00:16:26,028 --> 00:16:27,321
Really?

340
00:16:34,411 --> 00:16:35,913
[no audible dialogue]

341
00:16:36,038 --> 00:16:38,081
That's crazy.

342
00:16:39,041 --> 00:16:41,293
Charlie! Stuart.

343
00:16:41,418 --> 00:16:42,753
Carol.

344
00:16:42,878 --> 00:16:45,088
Are these back
in season again?

345
00:16:46,340 --> 00:16:48,133
You're getting married.

346
00:16:48,258 --> 00:16:50,802
What can I say?

347
00:16:50,928 --> 00:16:52,888
I guess you are
a lucky charm.

348
00:17:09,071 --> 00:17:09,947
[beep]

349
00:17:10,072 --> 00:17:12,157
<i>You have 14 new messages.</i>

350
00:17:12,282 --> 00:17:13,450
<i>Message 1.</i>

351
00:17:13,575 --> 00:17:15,536
<i>Hey, Charlie.
My name's Nicole Adams.</i>

352
00:17:15,661 --> 00:17:17,204
<i>You don't know me,</i>

353
00:17:17,329 --> 00:17:18,956
<i>but I got your number
from Amy in Radiology.</i>

354
00:17:19,081 --> 00:17:20,958
<i>I was wondering
if we could meet up</i>

355
00:17:21,083 --> 00:17:22,209
<i>for drinks
one of these nights.</i>

356
00:17:22,334 --> 00:17:23,210
[beep]

357
00:17:23,335 --> 00:17:25,212
<i>Hi, Charlie.
My name's Julia.</i>

358
00:17:25,337 --> 00:17:27,548
<i>I normally don't do this,
but I'm desperate.
Could you--</i>

359
00:17:27,673 --> 00:17:29,174
[beep]

360
00:17:29,299 --> 00:17:30,467
<i>I'm not sure how you
choose your dates,</i>

361
00:17:30,592 --> 00:17:31,760
<i>but I'm 5'10", blonde--</i>

362
00:17:31,885 --> 00:17:32,970
[beep]

363
00:17:33,095 --> 00:17:34,596
<i>Hello, Charlie.
My name is Daisy.</i>

364
00:17:34,721 --> 00:17:35,973
<i>Uh, actually in town--</i>

365
00:17:36,098 --> 00:17:36,974
[beep]

366
00:17:37,099 --> 00:17:38,475
<i>[Man]
Hi. My name is Bob.</i>

367
00:17:38,600 --> 00:17:40,227
<i>No, it's not a wrong number.
Hear me out.</i>

368
00:17:40,352 --> 00:17:41,478
[beep]

369
00:17:41,603 --> 00:17:42,563
<i>Hi. This is Cindy.</i>

370
00:17:42,688 --> 00:17:43,730
<i>I'm a friend of Katie's--</i>

371
00:17:43,856 --> 00:17:44,731
[beep]

372
00:17:44,857 --> 00:17:45,732
<i>Hey, my name's Colleen--</i>

373
00:17:45,858 --> 00:17:47,067
[beep]

374
00:17:47,192 --> 00:17:48,151
<i>Hey, there.
We met at the gym.</i>

375
00:17:48,277 --> 00:17:49,111
<i>StairMaster buddies?</i>

376
00:17:54,116 --> 00:17:55,993
[Cam]
Eat up, Shadow.

377
00:17:56,118 --> 00:17:58,662
Last chance
before bedtime.

378
00:17:58,787 --> 00:18:00,873
Good boy.

379
00:18:00,998 --> 00:18:03,625
Grumpy,
don't be a pig.

380
00:18:03,750 --> 00:18:07,004
Don't be a pig.
That's Chester's.

381
00:18:07,129 --> 00:18:08,505
There you go.

382
00:18:08,630 --> 00:18:10,883
Good boy.

383
00:18:11,008 --> 00:18:12,968
Here, Dougie.
Gobble it up.

384
00:18:14,511 --> 00:18:16,180
Come here, Tina.

385
00:18:16,305 --> 00:18:18,640
Grumpy,
you're such a pig.

386
00:18:20,017 --> 00:18:21,768
Joe, hurry up!

387
00:18:21,894 --> 00:18:23,353
I want to go home.

388
00:18:27,149 --> 00:18:29,026
Did you get lost
back there?

389
00:18:29,151 --> 00:18:30,068
Sorry.

390
00:18:30,194 --> 00:18:32,321
Just taking five...

391
00:18:32,446 --> 00:18:34,823
hits from my bong.

392
00:18:34,948 --> 00:18:37,117
If they catch you with weed,
you're going to get fired.

393
00:18:37,242 --> 00:18:38,827
They don't care
that you're my brother.

394
00:18:38,952 --> 00:18:40,287
Oh, take
a chillaxitive.

395
00:18:40,412 --> 00:18:43,290
How is anybody
going to know?

396
00:18:43,415 --> 00:18:45,667
Maybe 'cause you smell
like you've been bathing
in bong water.

397
00:18:45,792 --> 00:18:46,668
[sniffs]

398
00:18:46,793 --> 00:18:48,295
Sweet.

399
00:18:48,420 --> 00:18:49,421
What's that in your pocket?

400
00:18:53,217 --> 00:18:55,511
Oh, I was looking for this.

401
00:18:55,636 --> 00:18:57,054
Three months.

402
00:18:57,179 --> 00:18:59,014
Hey, Skully.

403
00:19:01,183 --> 00:19:02,893
Oh!

404
00:19:03,018 --> 00:19:04,728
Ooh! Ooh! Whoo! Whoo!

405
00:19:04,853 --> 00:19:06,897
Joe! Joe, I'm slipping!

406
00:19:07,022 --> 00:19:08,565
Ohh! Ohh!

407
00:19:13,445 --> 00:19:15,489
And you think
I look wasted.

408
00:19:21,078 --> 00:19:23,163
Grumpy, no!

409
00:19:35,008 --> 00:19:36,051
You okay?

410
00:19:37,928 --> 00:19:39,471
I think I chipped a tooth.

411
00:19:40,931 --> 00:19:42,307
It's great
to finally meet you.

412
00:19:42,432 --> 00:19:43,517
Let me get that
for you.

413
00:19:43,642 --> 00:19:45,227
- Oh, thank you.
- Sure.

414
00:19:47,479 --> 00:19:49,022
- All right?
- Yeah.

415
00:19:54,736 --> 00:19:55,779
All right.

416
00:19:55,904 --> 00:19:56,780
Are you ready?

417
00:19:56,905 --> 00:19:58,115
Yeah, let's go.

418
00:20:04,079 --> 00:20:05,289
Don't you want to, uh--

419
00:20:05,414 --> 00:20:06,623
What?

420
00:20:06,748 --> 00:20:07,666
Oh...
[chuckling]

421
00:20:08,959 --> 00:20:10,127
I don't know,
have dinner first?

422
00:20:10,252 --> 00:20:12,087
Is that how this works?

423
00:20:12,212 --> 00:20:14,131
How what works?

424
00:20:14,256 --> 00:20:15,215
The thing.

425
00:20:15,340 --> 00:20:17,092
The thing. The magic.

426
00:20:17,217 --> 00:20:18,135
The charm.

427
00:20:18,260 --> 00:20:19,720
[horn honking]

428
00:20:19,845 --> 00:20:21,680
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Wait a second.

429
00:20:21,805 --> 00:20:23,223
[moaning]

430
00:20:23,348 --> 00:20:25,392
Gretel, what the hell
are you talking about?

431
00:20:25,517 --> 00:20:27,811
You're a lucky charm.
You have sex with someone,

432
00:20:27,936 --> 00:20:29,605
and then they find
their true love.

433
00:20:29,730 --> 00:20:31,023
Isn't that how it works?

434
00:20:31,148 --> 00:20:32,149
Has everybody
lost their minds?

435
00:20:32,274 --> 00:20:33,150
That's ridiculous.
That's absurd.

436
00:20:33,275 --> 00:20:35,944
Do you want top
or bottom?

437
00:20:36,069 --> 00:20:37,696
Put that back
in your secret booby place.

438
00:20:37,821 --> 00:20:40,157
That's-- No.

439
00:20:40,324 --> 00:20:42,326
I don't want to take
advantage of you.

440
00:20:43,285 --> 00:20:45,162
Oh.

441
00:20:45,287 --> 00:20:48,040
Look, don't take this
so seriously.

442
00:20:48,165 --> 00:20:49,166
I'm certainly not.

443
00:20:49,291 --> 00:20:51,126
I'm doing this on a lark.

444
00:20:51,251 --> 00:20:53,670
And you won't be
taking advantage of me.

445
00:20:53,795 --> 00:20:56,798
Do you know how many
loser boyfriends I have had?

446
00:20:56,924 --> 00:20:59,343
Do you know how many times
I have given myself--

447
00:20:59,468 --> 00:21:01,386
body, mind, soul--

448
00:21:01,512 --> 00:21:03,347
hoping that this was it,
this was the one,

449
00:21:03,472 --> 00:21:08,143
only to find out he was
just another asshole?

450
00:21:08,268 --> 00:21:10,270
Look, if there's a chance--

451
00:21:10,395 --> 00:21:15,442
I mean even a .0001% chance
that you are the key,

452
00:21:15,567 --> 00:21:19,238
that being with you
could open the door
to something better,

453
00:21:19,363 --> 00:21:23,992
well, I think I'd be
taking advantage of you.

454
00:21:26,745 --> 00:21:29,164
Do you want to have sex
before or after dinner?

455
00:21:29,289 --> 00:21:31,667
Actually,
I have dinner plans.

456
00:21:31,792 --> 00:21:33,210
[cell phone beeping]

457
00:21:33,335 --> 00:21:36,213
I got to get that.
It's my emergency line.

458
00:21:36,338 --> 00:21:38,215
Oh. Emergency.
Now, that's sexy.

459
00:21:38,340 --> 00:21:39,466
Dr. Logan speaking.

460
00:21:39,591 --> 00:21:41,718
Hey, it's Cam Wexler.

461
00:21:41,844 --> 00:21:43,846
Remember,
from the wedding?

462
00:21:43,971 --> 00:21:45,722
The serial killer?

463
00:21:49,852 --> 00:21:51,228
Yeah. Yeah, hi.

464
00:21:51,353 --> 00:21:52,646
<i>I'm sorry to bother you,</i>

465
00:21:52,771 --> 00:21:55,232
but I have a bit
of a dental emergency.

466
00:21:55,357 --> 00:21:57,484
You don't have to make up
stories, Cam.

467
00:21:57,609 --> 00:22:00,529
If you want to see me,
all you have to do is ask.

468
00:22:00,654 --> 00:22:02,239
No, seriously.
I chipped a tooth,

469
00:22:02,364 --> 00:22:03,407
and it's Saturday night,

470
00:22:03,532 --> 00:22:06,034
and I don't know
who else to call.

471
00:22:06,159 --> 00:22:07,452
Oh, you chipped a tooth?
How?

472
00:22:07,578 --> 00:22:09,538
I slipped while having
a fish fight,

473
00:22:09,663 --> 00:22:11,039
slid down an ice ramp,

474
00:22:11,164 --> 00:22:12,499
got tackled by a penguin,

475
00:22:12,624 --> 00:22:14,668
and fell face-first
into a fake ice boulder.

476
00:22:14,793 --> 00:22:16,962
This is very common.

477
00:22:17,087 --> 00:22:18,547
- [chuckling]
<i>- Do you know
where my office is?</i>

478
00:22:18,672 --> 00:22:21,175
Yeah. I got your card
right here.

479
00:22:21,300 --> 00:22:22,926
I can be there
in 20 minutes?

480
00:22:23,051 --> 00:22:24,887
<i>20 minutes.
I'm leaving now.</i>

481
00:22:25,012 --> 00:22:26,430
Okay.

482
00:22:39,401 --> 00:22:41,278
Okay, all fixed.

483
00:22:41,403 --> 00:22:42,696
Does that hurt?

484
00:22:42,821 --> 00:22:44,072
Uh-uh.

485
00:22:44,198 --> 00:22:46,283
Can you describe the penguin
that attacked you?

486
00:22:46,408 --> 00:22:47,659
Very funny.

487
00:22:47,784 --> 00:22:48,785
You can rinse.

488
00:22:52,039 --> 00:22:53,457
So what really happened?

489
00:22:53,582 --> 00:22:55,417
Did you get caught
in the middle

490
00:22:55,542 --> 00:22:57,169
of some North Pole-
South Pole gang war?

491
00:22:57,294 --> 00:22:59,296
There are no penguins
in the North Pole.

492
00:22:59,421 --> 00:23:00,797
That's polar bears.

493
00:23:00,923 --> 00:23:02,925
You really are
a penguin freak,
aren't you?

494
00:23:03,050 --> 00:23:04,343
Oh, you have no idea.

495
00:23:04,468 --> 00:23:06,595
Obsessed is putting
it mildly.

496
00:23:06,720 --> 00:23:08,597
I believe you.

497
00:23:08,722 --> 00:23:10,349
Oh, what's that?

498
00:23:10,474 --> 00:23:14,102
Oh, um, I travel
to Guatemala every year

499
00:23:14,228 --> 00:23:15,687
to help some
of the poorer villagers.

500
00:23:16,939 --> 00:23:18,899
That's so sweet.

501
00:23:19,024 --> 00:23:20,317
Ohh!

502
00:23:20,442 --> 00:23:23,153
Aah!
Sorry!

503
00:23:23,278 --> 00:23:24,738
Oh! Oh, no!
They went in!

504
00:23:24,863 --> 00:23:25,739
They're in there!

505
00:23:25,864 --> 00:23:27,074
- What's in there?
- The things!

506
00:23:27,199 --> 00:23:28,742
Oh, here.

507
00:23:28,867 --> 00:23:31,119
Oh, I'm sorry.

508
00:23:31,245 --> 00:23:33,580
This is bad.

509
00:23:33,705 --> 00:23:34,831
You're hurt.
It's okay.

510
00:23:34,957 --> 00:23:35,999
I'm so sorry.

511
00:23:36,124 --> 00:23:37,626
Should have worn
that lead vest.

512
00:23:37,751 --> 00:23:40,712
Oh, this always
happens to me.

513
00:23:40,838 --> 00:23:42,172
Are you okay?

514
00:23:42,297 --> 00:23:43,340
Yes. Yeah, I'm fine.

515
00:23:43,465 --> 00:23:44,967
You sure?
I feel good.

516
00:23:45,092 --> 00:23:48,637
Man. I hope you let me
buy you a new shirt.

517
00:23:48,762 --> 00:23:51,640
No. No, really.
It's, uh, it's good.

518
00:23:51,765 --> 00:23:54,351
But I hope you'll let me
take you out to dinner

519
00:23:54,476 --> 00:23:56,603
sometime.

520
00:23:56,728 --> 00:23:58,772
Trust me, you can do
far more damage with
a steak knife.

521
00:23:58,897 --> 00:24:02,234
I'm sorry. I-- I can't.

522
00:24:02,359 --> 00:24:04,611
How much do I owe you
for the tooth?

523
00:24:04,736 --> 00:24:06,530
Wait a second.
So you will draw first blood,

524
00:24:06,655 --> 00:24:09,533
but you won't
make it up to me?

525
00:24:09,658 --> 00:24:12,369
Please, how much?

526
00:24:12,494 --> 00:24:13,370
Mm-mm. No.

527
00:24:13,495 --> 00:24:14,955
Your money's no good here.

528
00:24:15,080 --> 00:24:17,249
You sure?
Mm-hmm.

529
00:24:17,374 --> 00:24:18,375
I will not accept that.

530
00:24:18,500 --> 00:24:20,586
Really?

531
00:24:20,711 --> 00:24:21,587
Thank you.

532
00:24:21,712 --> 00:24:22,546
Yes.

533
00:24:23,922 --> 00:24:25,507
I'm sorry.
No.

534
00:24:27,217 --> 00:24:29,553
See you in six months
for a routine stabbing.

535
00:24:30,512 --> 00:24:32,181
Bye.
Bye.

536
00:24:47,362 --> 00:24:49,114
Ah. Change your mind?

537
00:24:49,239 --> 00:24:50,449
My car won't start.

538
00:24:50,574 --> 00:24:52,492
Mm-hmm. Sure it won't.

539
00:24:52,618 --> 00:24:54,578
No, really.
I left my lights on.

540
00:24:57,706 --> 00:24:58,999
Fine.
I'm pushing the car.

541
00:24:59,124 --> 00:25:01,335
No, no, no, wait.
I want to jump you.

542
00:25:09,551 --> 00:25:10,636
Now?

543
00:25:10,761 --> 00:25:13,222
Not now. Wait till I
get this in here.

544
00:25:13,347 --> 00:25:14,890
Now?

545
00:25:15,015 --> 00:25:16,808
[screams]

546
00:25:16,934 --> 00:25:17,809
[gasp]

547
00:25:17,935 --> 00:25:19,269
Oh!

548
00:25:21,104 --> 00:25:22,439
You okay?

549
00:25:22,564 --> 00:25:23,440
Yep.

550
00:25:23,565 --> 00:25:24,441
Let's--

551
00:25:24,566 --> 00:25:25,734
I'm so sorry.

552
00:25:25,859 --> 00:25:27,444
No, no. It's fine.
It's good.

553
00:25:27,569 --> 00:25:29,238
Cauterized my wounds.

554
00:25:31,782 --> 00:25:32,741
Thank you.

555
00:25:32,866 --> 00:25:35,452
Thank you
for fixing my tooth

556
00:25:35,577 --> 00:25:36,870
and jumping my car.

557
00:25:36,995 --> 00:25:38,372
Don't mention it.

558
00:25:43,418 --> 00:25:45,462
And thank you
for taking me home

559
00:25:45,587 --> 00:25:47,631
to get my spare
set of keys.

560
00:25:53,846 --> 00:25:56,932
I have a feeling
this kind of thing
happens to you often.

561
00:25:57,057 --> 00:25:59,518
My brother
calls me Murphy.

562
00:25:59,643 --> 00:26:00,519
Murphy?

563
00:26:00,644 --> 00:26:02,563
You know,
like, Murphy's Law:

564
00:26:02,688 --> 00:26:04,481
anything that can
go wrong, will.

565
00:26:04,606 --> 00:26:05,983
Details.

566
00:26:06,108 --> 00:26:07,693
Check out the thumb.

567
00:26:07,818 --> 00:26:08,861
Uch!

568
00:26:08,986 --> 00:26:10,362
Holy crap!

569
00:26:10,487 --> 00:26:12,406
What, did you get
pissed off at a stamp?

570
00:26:13,615 --> 00:26:15,450
How many bones
have you broken?

571
00:26:15,576 --> 00:26:16,493
12.

572
00:26:16,618 --> 00:26:17,744
12 bones?

573
00:26:17,870 --> 00:26:20,747
I'm warning you,
keep a safe distance.

574
00:26:20,873 --> 00:26:23,083
Come on. I can't believe
it's really that bad.

575
00:26:23,208 --> 00:26:25,335
Ooh. Is this the heat?

576
00:26:25,460 --> 00:26:26,503
No!

577
00:26:30,007 --> 00:26:31,550
Convertible top.

578
00:26:31,675 --> 00:26:33,635
Oops.

579
00:26:37,639 --> 00:26:38,891
Keep the meter running.

580
00:26:39,016 --> 00:26:39,892
All right.

581
00:26:40,017 --> 00:26:41,393
Oh, shit!

582
00:26:41,518 --> 00:26:44,104
Shit! Shit! Shit!

583
00:26:44,229 --> 00:26:45,772
Pardon my French.

584
00:26:45,898 --> 00:26:48,567
I speak a little French,
and that sounded like "shit."

585
00:26:48,692 --> 00:26:50,986
I left my house key
on the car ring--

586
00:26:51,111 --> 00:26:52,362
You know what?
Doesn't matter.

587
00:27:10,088 --> 00:27:11,173
Got it!

588
00:27:17,763 --> 00:27:19,348
- Oh!
- Ooh.

589
00:27:19,473 --> 00:27:20,224
- Sorry.
- You all right?

590
00:27:20,349 --> 00:27:21,808
Yeah.

591
00:27:21,934 --> 00:27:23,560
- Hope these are
the right keys.
- Yeah.

592
00:27:37,741 --> 00:27:39,034
Thank you.

593
00:27:39,159 --> 00:27:41,286
I'm sorry about the top,

594
00:27:41,411 --> 00:27:43,580
and the, uh,
nerve damage in the back,

595
00:27:43,705 --> 00:27:46,667
and the whole
electrocution thing, and--

596
00:27:46,792 --> 00:27:49,586
I'd still like
to pay for the tooth.

597
00:27:49,711 --> 00:27:51,547
I told you. Buy me dinner.

598
00:27:53,257 --> 00:27:54,591
Lunch.

599
00:27:54,716 --> 00:27:56,468
Vending machine.

600
00:27:56,593 --> 00:27:59,555
Drinks. Water.
I'm easy.

601
00:28:07,062 --> 00:28:08,814
I'm just...

602
00:28:08,939 --> 00:28:11,233
not emotionally available
at this time.

603
00:28:11,358 --> 00:28:12,901
I'm okay with that.

604
00:28:13,026 --> 00:28:15,070
I'm looking
for more of a physical
relationship anyway.

605
00:28:15,195 --> 00:28:17,656
So I've heard.

606
00:28:18,740 --> 00:28:19,825
That-- I was kidding.

607
00:28:19,950 --> 00:28:22,619
That was a joke.
That was a stupid joke.

608
00:28:22,744 --> 00:28:26,206
Okay. I-- I get it.

609
00:28:26,331 --> 00:28:27,583
So no way, then.

610
00:28:29,543 --> 00:28:30,627
I'm sorry.

611
00:28:33,422 --> 00:28:34,756
Good night, Dr. Logan.

612
00:28:43,765 --> 00:28:44,641
Thank you.

613
00:28:44,766 --> 00:28:46,810
I, uh...

614
00:28:46,935 --> 00:28:48,812
Yeah.

615
00:29:30,187 --> 00:29:31,605
Hi, Dr. Charlie.

616
00:29:31,730 --> 00:29:33,690
Reba! What the hell
are you doing here?

617
00:29:33,815 --> 00:29:35,150
Sorry. I didn't mean
to scare you.

618
00:29:35,275 --> 00:29:37,528
I used the key you left me
in case of emergencies.

619
00:29:37,653 --> 00:29:39,696
What's the emergency?

620
00:29:39,821 --> 00:29:42,533
I know about the charm.

621
00:29:43,492 --> 00:29:44,493
Not you, too.

622
00:29:44,618 --> 00:29:45,702
Somebody
posted about you

623
00:29:45,827 --> 00:29:47,454
on perfectmatch.com

624
00:29:47,579 --> 00:29:49,289
It's an internet
dating site.

625
00:29:49,414 --> 00:29:50,707
Yeah, I know what it is.

626
00:29:50,832 --> 00:29:51,917
This is out of control.

627
00:29:52,042 --> 00:29:53,502
These stories
are just coincidence.

628
00:29:53,627 --> 00:29:54,878
That's what I thought.

629
00:29:55,003 --> 00:29:57,714
But then I went
to urbanlegends.com,

630
00:29:57,840 --> 00:29:59,424
and nobody's disproved it.

631
00:29:59,550 --> 00:30:02,302
Reba, I'll see you
at work on Monday.
Good night.

632
00:30:02,427 --> 00:30:04,137
Dr. Logan, you've always
been there for me.

633
00:30:04,263 --> 00:30:05,764
When you need
a day off, yes.

634
00:30:05,889 --> 00:30:07,724
When you need
a lift home, yes.

635
00:30:07,850 --> 00:30:09,726
When Reggie died
four years ago,

636
00:30:09,852 --> 00:30:11,603
you sent
that beautiful card.

637
00:30:11,728 --> 00:30:13,063
Do you remember
what you wrote?

638
00:30:13,188 --> 00:30:16,358
"If there's anything I can do,
please let me know."

639
00:30:16,483 --> 00:30:17,609
Yeah, but, uh--

640
00:30:17,734 --> 00:30:19,736
Well, I'm letting
you know.

641
00:30:21,947 --> 00:30:23,407
That's not
what I had in mind.

642
00:30:23,532 --> 00:30:24,741
These panties are edible,

643
00:30:24,867 --> 00:30:26,827
but I'd avoid the tush area

644
00:30:26,952 --> 00:30:29,121
as I've been sitting
for about three hours.

645
00:30:29,246 --> 00:30:30,747
Reba, I'm not
the guy for you.

646
00:30:30,873 --> 00:30:32,249
I'm not saying you are.

647
00:30:32,374 --> 00:30:34,585
But the next guy
might be.

648
00:30:34,710 --> 00:30:36,253
Dr. Charlie,
if we're together,

649
00:30:36,378 --> 00:30:37,921
I know I'll find
my soul mate.

650
00:30:38,046 --> 00:30:39,923
That-- That's ridiculous.

651
00:30:42,050 --> 00:30:43,677
No.

652
00:30:43,802 --> 00:30:45,220
No, Reba. Don't cry.
It's okay.

653
00:30:45,345 --> 00:30:46,805
Raah!

654
00:30:46,930 --> 00:30:48,056
Come on, Dr. Charlie.

655
00:30:48,182 --> 00:30:50,058
You got to do this for me.
Please.

656
00:30:50,184 --> 00:30:51,059
Reba!
Charlie--

657
00:30:51,185 --> 00:30:52,269
Oh!

658
00:30:54,897 --> 00:30:56,607
I can't do this.

659
00:30:56,732 --> 00:30:58,358
Don't worry.

660
00:30:58,483 --> 00:31:00,110
I'll do everything.

661
00:31:00,235 --> 00:31:01,445
Please.

662
00:31:01,570 --> 00:31:04,281
Just close your eyes

663
00:31:04,406 --> 00:31:07,826
and imagine somebody
beautiful.

664
00:31:19,004 --> 00:31:21,340
I'll imagine you.

665
00:31:22,716 --> 00:31:24,927
No one but you.

666
00:31:27,930 --> 00:31:28,805
Reba?

667
00:31:28,931 --> 00:31:30,474
You slept with Reba?

668
00:31:30,599 --> 00:31:31,808
Shh! Shut up.

669
00:31:31,934 --> 00:31:32,893
You shut up.

670
00:31:33,018 --> 00:31:34,811
What the hell's
the matter with you?

671
00:31:34,937 --> 00:31:36,813
You're telling me
that you have the power

672
00:31:36,939 --> 00:31:38,232
to turn any hot chick
out there--

673
00:31:38,357 --> 00:31:40,108
any hot chick--

674
00:31:40,234 --> 00:31:44,071
into a knob-gobbling,
lance-waxing flesh monger,

675
00:31:44,196 --> 00:31:46,823
and you're out there
plowing the back 40
with Reba!

676
00:31:46,949 --> 00:31:49,034
You don't know
because you weren't there.

677
00:31:49,159 --> 00:31:50,661
Uch!
Thank God I wasn't there.

678
00:31:50,786 --> 00:31:52,829
It's disgusting.
It's revolting.

679
00:31:52,955 --> 00:31:54,039
You're nasty.

680
00:31:54,164 --> 00:31:55,123
How was she?

681
00:31:57,167 --> 00:31:58,961
Dude, check it.

682
00:31:59,086 --> 00:32:01,713
You see, that is
the kind of tail
you should be chasing.

683
00:32:01,839 --> 00:32:03,841
I could suck a fart
out of her ass

684
00:32:03,966 --> 00:32:05,092
and hold it
like a bong hit.

685
00:32:05,217 --> 00:32:07,302
[fart noise, sucking in]

686
00:32:07,427 --> 00:32:08,971
- [grunt]
- Uhh!

687
00:32:10,389 --> 00:32:12,891
Nice stop, kid.
Way to be.

688
00:32:14,768 --> 00:32:16,144
Dude, these chicks,

689
00:32:16,270 --> 00:32:18,564
they think that you're,
like, a lucky charm, man.

690
00:32:18,689 --> 00:32:19,857
I mean,
you poke the poon,

691
00:32:19,982 --> 00:32:21,233
she marries
the next guy

692
00:32:21,358 --> 00:32:22,651
she dates after you.

693
00:32:22,776 --> 00:32:23,902
It's not true.

694
00:32:24,027 --> 00:32:25,362
Who cares if it's true?

695
00:32:25,487 --> 00:32:26,864
Wake up, man.

696
00:32:26,989 --> 00:32:28,699
You got it made.

697
00:32:28,824 --> 00:32:30,909
What is it
that all women want?

698
00:32:31,034 --> 00:32:33,537
To get married,

699
00:32:33,662 --> 00:32:35,747
raise crib midgets,

700
00:32:35,873 --> 00:32:37,541
and apparently, buddy,

701
00:32:37,666 --> 00:32:39,877
you got the ticket
to the big show.

702
00:32:40,002 --> 00:32:41,461
Do you know
what this means?

703
00:32:41,587 --> 00:32:43,213
Trim.

704
00:32:43,338 --> 00:32:45,883
You're going to be seeing
trim like Tommy Lee,

705
00:32:46,008 --> 00:32:47,593
like Colin Farrell,

706
00:32:47,718 --> 00:32:49,636
like Ellen DeGeneres--
just--

707
00:32:52,181 --> 00:32:53,682
Ohh!

708
00:32:53,807 --> 00:32:54,892
Have you considered
the possibility the reason

709
00:32:55,017 --> 00:32:56,977
you haven't been laid
in the last decade

710
00:32:57,102 --> 00:33:00,230
has something to do
with your routine use
of the word "trim"?

711
00:33:00,355 --> 00:33:02,900
Yeah!
Seven days a week,
56 weeks a year, trim!

712
00:33:03,025 --> 00:33:04,860
Ohh!

713
00:33:06,028 --> 00:33:06,987
That's my bad.

714
00:33:07,112 --> 00:33:09,448
Where's your manners, shithead?

715
00:33:09,573 --> 00:33:11,074
What did you say to me?

716
00:33:13,076 --> 00:33:14,077
Little help here, honey?

717
00:33:18,874 --> 00:33:20,751
Look, you and I
are different, okay?

718
00:33:20,876 --> 00:33:22,753
Besides the fact
that I'm not retarded,

719
00:33:22,878 --> 00:33:24,546
I don't want
to take advantage.

720
00:33:24,671 --> 00:33:25,964
Dude.
Yeah.

721
00:33:26,089 --> 00:33:28,300
Was Martin Luther King,
Jr. taking advantage

722
00:33:28,425 --> 00:33:30,511
when he said that thing
in that place?

723
00:33:30,636 --> 00:33:32,471
I don't think so.

724
00:33:32,596 --> 00:33:36,183
Was Gandhi taking advantage
when he was doing his thing?

725
00:33:36,308 --> 00:33:38,060
No.

726
00:33:38,185 --> 00:33:40,062
And don't tell me
that Gandhi didn't score

727
00:33:40,187 --> 00:33:41,772
some sweet-ass
Native American trim.

728
00:33:41,897 --> 00:33:43,774
Gandhi was Indian.

729
00:33:43,899 --> 00:33:45,943
They don't like
to be called that.

730
00:33:46,068 --> 00:33:48,612
Dude, I thought
you wanted to feel love.

731
00:33:48,737 --> 00:33:49,905
I do.

732
00:33:50,030 --> 00:33:51,907
So stop dipping
your foot in the pool

733
00:33:52,032 --> 00:33:53,825
and dive the fuck in!

734
00:33:53,951 --> 00:33:55,744
And think about this, man.

735
00:33:55,869 --> 00:33:57,955
You'd be providing
a much-needed
public service.

736
00:33:58,080 --> 00:34:01,124
You'd be helping women
find love.

737
00:34:01,250 --> 00:34:02,876
Now, don't come
bitching to me

738
00:34:03,001 --> 00:34:04,127
you haven't found
Miss Right yet

739
00:34:04,253 --> 00:34:06,547
if you got
women lining up
for the position

740
00:34:06,672 --> 00:34:08,924
and you're turning
your back on them.

741
00:34:12,302 --> 00:34:13,178
Nice.

742
00:34:15,305 --> 00:34:17,015
I guess.

743
00:34:17,140 --> 00:34:19,267
If I did it
for the right reasons.

744
00:34:19,268 --> 00:34:22,855
Whatever helps you
sleep at night, biznatch.

745
00:34:23,063 --> 00:34:24,982
<i>♪ [rock]</i>

746
00:34:41,665 --> 00:34:43,292
<i>♪ Oh ♪</i>

747
00:34:43,417 --> 00:34:46,086
♪ Jenny, Gina,
Angie, Amy, Heather, Marie ♪

748
00:34:46,211 --> 00:34:49,256
♪ Chrissy, Lissy, Andrea,
They're coming after me ♪

749
00:34:49,381 --> 00:34:52,217
♪ Ginny, Winny, Rhonda,
Charlotte, Sarah and Joe ♪

750
00:34:52,342 --> 00:34:55,262
♪ Maria and Diana, they just
won't leave me alone ♪

751
00:34:55,387 --> 00:34:57,264
No, no, no. Whoa, whoa.
Don't take off my top.

752
00:34:57,389 --> 00:34:59,474
Something wrong?

753
00:34:59,600 --> 00:35:01,226
They're for the baby.

754
00:35:01,351 --> 00:35:03,020
You have a baby?

755
00:35:03,145 --> 00:35:06,190
No, but I will someday.

756
00:35:07,649 --> 00:35:09,193
<i>♪ [continues]</i>

757
00:35:12,154 --> 00:35:13,530
It's really good.
[giggles]

758
00:35:14,823 --> 00:35:15,616
Fuck me.
[giggling]

759
00:35:18,619 --> 00:35:19,620
Fuck me harder.

760
00:35:19,745 --> 00:35:21,496
[exhales]
Whew.

761
00:35:21,622 --> 00:35:23,832
Oh. Yeah.

762
00:35:23,957 --> 00:35:25,042
- Fuck me!
- [nervous chuckle]

763
00:35:25,167 --> 00:35:27,294
- Fuck me!
- I'm fuckin'.

764
00:35:27,419 --> 00:35:29,880
Fuck me, you cocksucking,
cum-guzzling shithead!

765
00:35:30,005 --> 00:35:31,048
Split my pussy in two!

766
00:35:31,173 --> 00:35:33,258
You motherfucking asshole!

767
00:35:37,596 --> 00:35:38,889
Is something wrong?

768
00:35:41,600 --> 00:35:44,478
♪ Jana, Ana, Lindsey, Lila,
Catherine, Louise ♪

769
00:35:44,603 --> 00:35:47,523
♪ Sabrina, Gina, Julia,
Alexis, Emily ♪

770
00:35:47,648 --> 00:35:50,442
♪ Rita and Veronica,
Shaniqua, Evelyn ♪

771
00:35:50,567 --> 00:35:53,779
♪ [indistinct]
But they can fit me in ♪

772
00:35:53,904 --> 00:35:56,490
♪ Elisa, Lisa, Maggie,
Rowley, Jennifer, Beth ♪

773
00:35:56,615 --> 00:35:58,116
♪ Bridgette, Nian, Babs ♪

774
00:35:58,242 --> 00:36:00,077
♪ Oh, yeah,
they're working me to death ♪

775
00:36:00,202 --> 00:36:02,913
♪ Catherine, Johny, Leah, Mia,
Stephanie, Jane ♪

776
00:36:03,038 --> 00:36:05,707
♪ Sissy, Chrissy, Elizabeth,
They're making me insane ♪

777
00:36:05,832 --> 00:36:07,543
♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪

778
00:36:07,668 --> 00:36:09,378
♪ All right, whoa! ♪

779
00:36:15,676 --> 00:36:17,719
[siren wailing]

780
00:36:30,023 --> 00:36:31,275
Yeah, I don't
do that with men.

781
00:36:40,993 --> 00:36:42,411
Oh, yeah. That's it.

782
00:36:42,536 --> 00:36:44,329
That's definitely it!

783
00:36:44,454 --> 00:36:46,164
That'll be
my wedding dress.

784
00:36:46,290 --> 00:36:48,041
What do you think?

785
00:36:48,166 --> 00:36:50,252
<i>♪ [continues]</i>

786
00:37:02,931 --> 00:37:03,682
<i>♪ [ends]</i>

787
00:37:06,059 --> 00:37:07,311
Thanks.

788
00:37:10,272 --> 00:37:11,273
You're welcome.

789
00:37:14,860 --> 00:37:17,070
- This just isn't
working for me.
- Yeah, right.

790
00:37:17,196 --> 00:37:18,864
You're just gonna give up
boning all these women?

791
00:37:18,989 --> 00:37:21,074
These girls don't want
to be with me.

792
00:37:21,200 --> 00:37:23,202
They want to be
with the next guy.

793
00:37:23,327 --> 00:37:26,163
So what? The road
to the next guy
leads through you.

794
00:37:26,288 --> 00:37:28,916
It's not that satisfying.

795
00:37:29,041 --> 00:37:31,001
I'll tell you
not satisfying.

796
00:37:31,126 --> 00:37:33,545
Last night I masturbated
into a grapefruit.

797
00:37:35,923 --> 00:37:37,257
I put it
in the microwave.

798
00:37:37,382 --> 00:37:38,592
I heated it up
a little bit,
which helped,

799
00:37:38,717 --> 00:37:39,593
but...

800
00:37:39,718 --> 00:37:42,346
still.

801
00:37:47,309 --> 00:37:49,436
[belches]

802
00:37:49,561 --> 00:37:53,232
You know, I read somewhere
that penguins like to eat
their own shit.

803
00:38:02,741 --> 00:38:03,867
[beeps]

804
00:38:03,992 --> 00:38:06,203
<i>You have 108 messages.</i>

805
00:38:06,328 --> 00:38:07,204
[beeping]

806
00:38:07,329 --> 00:38:09,373
<i>Messages deleted.</i>

807
00:38:13,752 --> 00:38:15,212
[blows whistle]

808
00:38:15,337 --> 00:38:17,840
[cheering and applause]

809
00:38:19,758 --> 00:38:22,219
[roaring]

810
00:38:22,344 --> 00:38:23,679
[blows raspberry]

811
00:38:23,804 --> 00:38:26,223
<i>[Cam on P.A.]
The female lays a single egg</i>

812
00:38:26,348 --> 00:38:28,100
<i>and rolls it onto
the feet of the male.</i>

813
00:38:28,225 --> 00:38:30,727
<i>The male stands
and incubates the egg</i>

814
00:38:30,853 --> 00:38:32,187
<i>until it hatches,</i>

815
00:38:32,312 --> 00:38:33,856
<i>about 65 days.</i>

816
00:38:33,981 --> 00:38:36,233
<i>Having built up
a thick layer of fat</i>

817
00:38:36,358 --> 00:38:38,485
<i>to sustain him
through the long winter,</i>

818
00:38:38,610 --> 00:38:41,321
<i>he never leaves the egg
to hunt for food.</i>

819
00:38:41,446 --> 00:38:44,783
The female returns just
before the chick hatches.

820
00:38:48,203 --> 00:38:50,581
If you have any questions,
please feel free to ask.

821
00:38:58,172 --> 00:38:59,298
What are you doing here?

822
00:38:59,423 --> 00:39:01,258
Are you telling me
that the male penguin

823
00:39:01,383 --> 00:39:03,427
really lives off
his own fat for 65 days

824
00:39:03,552 --> 00:39:05,512
while he's protecting
the egg?

825
00:39:05,637 --> 00:39:07,264
You think that the female
could bring him, like,
a mackerel burger?

826
00:39:07,389 --> 00:39:11,059
Seriously,
why are you here?

827
00:39:11,185 --> 00:39:12,519
Look, I don't buy
the whole

828
00:39:12,644 --> 00:39:14,980
"I'm not emotionally
available" thing.

829
00:39:15,105 --> 00:39:17,733
Are you dying?
Is that why you don't want
to get involved with me?

830
00:39:17,858 --> 00:39:20,694
- Because you don't wanna
hurt me when you die?
- No, I'm not dying.

831
00:39:20,819 --> 00:39:23,614
Well, I'm not dying either,
so what is it, then?

832
00:39:23,739 --> 00:39:25,574
Am I not your type?
I can take it if it's that.

833
00:39:25,699 --> 00:39:28,285
[sighs]
I think you should go.

834
00:39:28,410 --> 00:39:29,745
No, I think
I should stay,

835
00:39:29,870 --> 00:39:32,539
because I paid $38.00
to see you today.

836
00:39:32,664 --> 00:39:34,791
And I'm not leaving
until you pay me
my money back.

837
00:39:34,917 --> 00:39:36,502
Is this the dude?

838
00:39:36,627 --> 00:39:38,295
- No. Joe!
- Have you been
talking about me?

839
00:39:38,420 --> 00:39:39,671
- Why aren't you wearing
your shirt?
- Huh?

840
00:39:39,796 --> 00:39:41,173
- Has she been talking
about me?
- Yeah.

841
00:39:41,298 --> 00:39:42,341
- No!
- You're the dentist.

842
00:39:42,466 --> 00:39:44,343
I am the dude!

843
00:39:44,468 --> 00:39:46,929
No, I mentioned you
in passing.

844
00:39:47,054 --> 00:39:48,305
I said you were funny.

845
00:39:48,430 --> 00:39:50,390
- Oh.
- And you said he was--

846
00:39:50,516 --> 00:39:53,310
And I said you were
charming and...

847
00:39:53,435 --> 00:39:55,062
good-looking, and...

848
00:39:55,187 --> 00:39:56,438
you have a nice smile.

849
00:39:56,563 --> 00:39:58,482
Oh, I would not go out
with me, either.

850
00:40:00,442 --> 00:40:03,153
Excuse me, miss?
How come the mommy penguin

851
00:40:03,278 --> 00:40:05,572
doesn't bring back food
for the daddy penguin?

852
00:40:05,697 --> 00:40:07,950
'Cause the daddy penguin
doesn't need any food, sweetie.

853
00:40:12,037 --> 00:40:13,622
- I have another question.
- Mm-hmm.

854
00:40:13,747 --> 00:40:16,375
Why won't you go out
with Charlie?

855
00:40:17,751 --> 00:40:20,337
- She'd love to.
- Joe!
You're my brother!

856
00:40:20,462 --> 00:40:22,381
Why are you taking
his side?

857
00:40:22,506 --> 00:40:24,424
- Because I know
how long it's been--
- Shh!

858
00:40:25,884 --> 00:40:27,511
Another word,
I hide your stash.

859
00:40:27,636 --> 00:40:28,929
[exhales]

860
00:40:29,054 --> 00:40:30,514
Go put a shirt on.

861
00:40:33,141 --> 00:40:34,351
Look, how about this.

862
00:40:34,476 --> 00:40:36,353
Why don't you eat,

863
00:40:36,478 --> 00:40:38,522
and I'll just
digest my own lard.

864
00:40:40,482 --> 00:40:41,984
Look...

865
00:40:42,109 --> 00:40:43,819
I just...

866
00:40:43,944 --> 00:40:46,405
I know three women
you've gone out with.

867
00:40:46,530 --> 00:40:48,532
I'm just not into dating
as a sport.

868
00:40:51,410 --> 00:40:53,287
Wait, you said if anybody
had any questions--

869
00:40:53,412 --> 00:40:55,455
- No! I'm not going out
with you!
- That's not my question.

870
00:40:55,581 --> 00:40:57,374
That was the little
girl's question.
I have a new question.

871
00:40:57,499 --> 00:40:59,585
What is that penguin
right there?

872
00:41:03,422 --> 00:41:05,549
That's a Gentoo,
one of several species

873
00:41:05,674 --> 00:41:08,385
of penguin that is
completely monogamous.

874
00:41:08,510 --> 00:41:10,262
I hope that answers
your question.

875
00:41:10,387 --> 00:41:12,097
Oh, and penguins
are unique

876
00:41:12,222 --> 00:41:15,267
in that mate selection
is up to the female.

877
00:41:15,392 --> 00:41:17,436
Much like
our relationship.

878
00:41:17,561 --> 00:41:19,479
Why do you wanna take me
to dinner so badly?

879
00:41:19,605 --> 00:41:20,731
You look hungry.

880
00:41:20,856 --> 00:41:22,357
Seriously.

881
00:41:23,609 --> 00:41:24,818
- Seriously?
- Yeah.

882
00:41:26,528 --> 00:41:28,697
Because you remind me
of these penguins.

883
00:41:31,408 --> 00:41:33,827
Yes, they're kind of
awkward and goofy.

884
00:41:35,537 --> 00:41:38,415
Yet in the water,
they're so beautiful.

885
00:41:45,380 --> 00:41:46,673
Okay.

886
00:41:46,798 --> 00:41:48,217
Okay, what?

887
00:41:48,342 --> 00:41:50,219
- Okay, dinner.
- Will you put that
in writing?

888
00:41:50,344 --> 00:41:52,054
[chuckles]
Don't push it.

889
00:41:52,179 --> 00:41:54,681
But only as friends...

890
00:41:54,806 --> 00:41:56,725
because if you must know,
there is someone else.

891
00:41:58,769 --> 00:42:00,854
His name is Howard Blaine.

892
00:42:00,979 --> 00:42:03,065
He is a foremost expert
on penguins,

893
00:42:03,190 --> 00:42:05,943
and I'm meeting him
later this year at
a conference.

894
00:42:06,068 --> 00:42:07,861
I'm interested in him.

895
00:42:07,986 --> 00:42:09,279
Well, I'm interested
in choreographing

896
00:42:09,404 --> 00:42:11,740
a wacky line dance
that sweeps the nation,

897
00:42:11,865 --> 00:42:14,451
but we both know
that's never gonna happen.

898
00:42:14,576 --> 00:42:16,453
One date as friends.

899
00:42:16,578 --> 00:42:18,455
Fine.

900
00:42:18,580 --> 00:42:19,957
Bye.

901
00:42:21,583 --> 00:42:23,210
I'm okay.
Just--

902
00:42:23,335 --> 00:42:24,545
- Yeah.
- I'm fine.

903
00:42:27,422 --> 00:42:28,632
Bye.

904
00:42:45,607 --> 00:42:48,068
So do sharks get cavities?

905
00:42:48,193 --> 00:42:49,736
No.

906
00:42:49,862 --> 00:42:51,363
You have no idea,
do you.
I don't know.

907
00:42:51,488 --> 00:42:53,156
[both laughing]

908
00:42:53,282 --> 00:42:54,992
I thought we were gonna
ask each other personal
questions.

909
00:42:55,117 --> 00:42:57,035
Isn't that the point
of 100 Questions?

910
00:42:57,160 --> 00:42:58,495
Is that your question?

911
00:42:58,620 --> 00:43:01,915
No, my question is...

912
00:43:02,040 --> 00:43:04,501
Why penguins? Why?

913
00:43:04,626 --> 00:43:05,669
Why teeth?

914
00:43:05,794 --> 00:43:06,962
Same as
every other dentist.

915
00:43:07,087 --> 00:43:08,213
Couldn't get
into med school.

916
00:43:08,338 --> 00:43:09,882
[giggling]
That's funny.

917
00:43:10,007 --> 00:43:12,176
My parents
didn't think so.

918
00:43:12,301 --> 00:43:14,303
So really,
why penguins?

919
00:43:14,428 --> 00:43:15,596
Couldn't get
into shark school.

920
00:43:18,473 --> 00:43:20,767
I don't know,
lots of reasons.

921
00:43:20,893 --> 00:43:23,145
For one, you can't help
but smile when you see
a penguin.

922
00:43:23,270 --> 00:43:26,523
Yeah, plus they have that
bad-ass tuxedo embedded
in their flesh.

923
00:43:26,648 --> 00:43:27,774
I know! They're just so cute.

924
00:43:27,900 --> 00:43:29,484
I just--
I just love 'em so much.

925
00:43:29,610 --> 00:43:32,404
I just love, love, love 'em!

926
00:43:32,529 --> 00:43:35,115
I even go to Antarctica
for research.

927
00:43:35,240 --> 00:43:37,117
Oh, it's so beautiful there.

928
00:43:37,242 --> 00:43:39,786
You know they have
once-a-year sunsets?

929
00:43:39,912 --> 00:43:42,039
You haven't seen beauty
until you've seen that.

930
00:43:42,164 --> 00:43:44,082
Oh, I don't know about that.

931
00:43:47,169 --> 00:43:50,214
And the penguin rituals
are just fascinating.

932
00:43:50,339 --> 00:43:52,549
Okay now, by rituals,
do you mean, like,

933
00:43:52,674 --> 00:43:54,176
eating their own poop?

934
00:43:54,301 --> 00:43:55,636
No.

935
00:43:55,761 --> 00:43:57,804
Like when a male
is sweet on a female,

936
00:43:57,930 --> 00:43:59,640
he searches
the entire beach

937
00:43:59,765 --> 00:44:02,017
to find the perfect pebble
to present to her.

938
00:44:02,142 --> 00:44:03,560
When he finally finds it,

939
00:44:03,685 --> 00:44:05,229
he waddles over

940
00:44:05,354 --> 00:44:08,148
and presents the stone
by placing it at her feet.

941
00:44:08,273 --> 00:44:10,567
If she accepts,
they'll be life-long mates.

942
00:44:10,692 --> 00:44:12,569
It's kind of like
an engagement ring.

943
00:44:12,694 --> 00:44:15,113
Yeah, it's unbelievable
to watch.

944
00:44:19,701 --> 00:44:21,578
I have a feeling

945
00:44:21,703 --> 00:44:23,622
that you are
a very good kisser.

946
00:44:23,747 --> 00:44:26,667
And I know this because
I spent an hour and a half
inside your mouth,

947
00:44:26,792 --> 00:44:28,585
and I scoped it out.

948
00:44:28,710 --> 00:44:30,754
What makes you think
I'll be kissing you, huh?

949
00:44:33,507 --> 00:44:36,009
- You all right?
- Ow. Ow.

950
00:44:36,134 --> 00:44:37,427
- Ow.
- You okay?

951
00:44:38,804 --> 00:44:39,721
Oh...

952
00:44:58,240 --> 00:45:00,617
I guess I was wrong about
the "really good kisser" thing.

953
00:45:02,995 --> 00:45:04,079
Come on, we'll find
something you're good at.

954
00:45:04,204 --> 00:45:05,455
What!

955
00:45:08,166 --> 00:45:10,586
[Stu]
Perfectly imperfect?
What the hell does that mean?

956
00:45:10,711 --> 00:45:12,087
I don't know.

957
00:45:12,212 --> 00:45:15,048
I mean, haven't you ever
fallen for someone's flaws?

958
00:45:15,174 --> 00:45:16,758
I'm a plastic surgeon.

959
00:45:16,884 --> 00:45:19,636
I see a flaw,
I pour spackle over it.

960
00:45:19,761 --> 00:45:21,471
Hey, are these new?

961
00:45:21,597 --> 00:45:23,015
Hey, hey, hey!
Hey, hey, no!

962
00:45:23,140 --> 00:45:26,643
No, you don't touch these.

963
00:45:26,768 --> 00:45:29,021
It's Pamela Anderson's
breast implants.

964
00:45:29,146 --> 00:45:31,231
Why are they not implanted
in her breasts?

965
00:45:31,356 --> 00:45:34,109
It's a reduction, baby.
This is what came out.

966
00:45:34,234 --> 00:45:36,486
So you're hoping
that some sick dude
will buy these?

967
00:45:36,612 --> 00:45:38,822
Some sick dude already did.

968
00:45:38,947 --> 00:45:40,699
This dude!

969
00:45:40,824 --> 00:45:43,160
What the hell do you
want Pamela Anderson's
breast fillings for?

970
00:45:43,285 --> 00:45:44,870
Why the hell do you want
Miss Penguin Pussy?

971
00:45:44,995 --> 00:45:46,747
To each his own, buddy.

972
00:45:46,872 --> 00:45:49,291
Oh, Miss Penguin Pussy.
Who the fuck are you?

973
00:45:49,416 --> 00:45:52,085
Stu Klaminsky.
Nice to meet you.

974
00:45:52,211 --> 00:45:55,547
Anyway, Cam's the one, man.

975
00:45:55,672 --> 00:45:57,841
When I'm with her,
I don't know, Stu.

976
00:45:57,966 --> 00:45:59,676
I mean, I feel like...

977
00:45:59,801 --> 00:46:00,761
[sigh]

978
00:46:00,886 --> 00:46:02,137
She just-- She--

979
00:46:02,262 --> 00:46:03,514
Completes you.

980
00:46:03,639 --> 00:46:04,723
- Screw you.
- Screw you.

981
00:46:04,848 --> 00:46:06,266
And can I just say

982
00:46:06,391 --> 00:46:08,143
that I'm an idiot
for listening to you?

983
00:46:08,268 --> 00:46:09,269
Public service.

984
00:46:09,394 --> 00:46:10,270
May I remind you

985
00:46:10,395 --> 00:46:11,647
that you got
your axle greased

986
00:46:11,772 --> 00:46:12,940
a fair amount
in the process?

987
00:46:13,065 --> 00:46:15,651
What's sex without love?

988
00:46:15,776 --> 00:46:17,861
Sex!

989
00:46:17,986 --> 00:46:21,114
It's still sex!

990
00:46:21,240 --> 00:46:22,950
Jesus Christ.

991
00:46:23,075 --> 00:46:26,119
I never met a guy so bummed
to squirt a little baby gravy.

992
00:46:26,245 --> 00:46:27,287
Baby gravy?

993
00:46:27,412 --> 00:46:29,665
You know, man chowder.

994
00:46:29,790 --> 00:46:31,250
[squirting noise]

995
00:46:31,375 --> 00:46:33,126
Geez.

996
00:46:33,252 --> 00:46:35,295
Can't believe you're going
cold turkey for this chick.

997
00:46:35,420 --> 00:46:37,714
If she wants me to be
more like a Gentoo,

998
00:46:37,840 --> 00:46:39,716
I'm going to be
like a Gentoo.

999
00:46:39,842 --> 00:46:41,093
You lost me.

1000
00:46:41,218 --> 00:46:43,929
Gentoo. It's
a monogamous penguin.

1001
00:46:44,054 --> 00:46:48,100
Who's ridiculed
by the other penguins

1002
00:46:48,225 --> 00:46:50,894
for being a fag.

1003
00:46:53,313 --> 00:46:54,898
Here it comes!

1004
00:46:58,026 --> 00:46:59,528
Whoo!

1005
00:47:00,863 --> 00:47:02,364
Whoa.

1006
00:47:02,489 --> 00:47:04,783
You got some--
right there.

1007
00:47:04,908 --> 00:47:06,326
Thanks.

1008
00:47:06,451 --> 00:47:07,744
Do I have any on me?

1009
00:47:07,870 --> 00:47:08,745
No, no.

1010
00:47:08,871 --> 00:47:09,955
You want to get that?

1011
00:47:11,331 --> 00:47:12,791
You're silly.

1012
00:47:14,585 --> 00:47:16,170
I have something for you.

1013
00:47:16,295 --> 00:47:17,379
Really?

1014
00:47:18,463 --> 00:47:19,923
A gift?
Mm-hmm.

1015
00:47:20,048 --> 00:47:21,633
Oh, bad form.

1016
00:47:21,758 --> 00:47:23,135
A gift on the third date?

1017
00:47:23,260 --> 00:47:24,428
Open it.

1018
00:47:24,553 --> 00:47:25,721
Okay.

1019
00:47:28,557 --> 00:47:30,017
[laughs]

1020
00:47:30,142 --> 00:47:32,269
You're an asshole.

1021
00:47:32,394 --> 00:47:34,188
Yes,
but a thoughtful asshole.

1022
00:47:34,313 --> 00:47:35,731
Thank you.

1023
00:47:38,817 --> 00:47:40,944
So, fess up about this charm.

1024
00:47:41,945 --> 00:47:43,071
You heard about that.

1025
00:47:43,197 --> 00:47:45,824
Yeah. It's quite a scam
you got going.

1026
00:47:45,949 --> 00:47:47,367
No, it's not me.
Please.

1027
00:47:47,492 --> 00:47:48,702
It's not. I'm serious.

1028
00:47:48,827 --> 00:47:50,287
Somebody somewhere
got it into their head

1029
00:47:50,412 --> 00:47:51,872
that once a girl's
been with me,

1030
00:47:51,997 --> 00:47:53,248
she'll
meet her true love

1031
00:47:53,373 --> 00:47:55,167
with the next guy
she goes out with.

1032
00:47:55,292 --> 00:47:56,126
Can you believe it?

1033
00:47:56,251 --> 00:47:58,045
Please.

1034
00:47:58,170 --> 00:48:00,422
People will believe
whatever they want to believe.

1035
00:48:14,561 --> 00:48:15,896
[Charlie]
Okay. I've got one for you.

1036
00:48:16,021 --> 00:48:17,898
Did you know
it is physically impossible

1037
00:48:18,023 --> 00:48:19,816
for a human being
to lick their own elbow?

1038
00:48:19,942 --> 00:48:20,859
How do you know that?

1039
00:48:20,984 --> 00:48:22,277
No one can do it.

1040
00:48:22,402 --> 00:48:23,987
All right. I can do it.

1041
00:48:28,617 --> 00:48:30,285
Can't do it, my friend.

1042
00:48:30,410 --> 00:48:31,578
All right, fine.

1043
00:48:31,703 --> 00:48:32,829
I've got one.

1044
00:48:32,955 --> 00:48:34,748
Did you know
that the average person

1045
00:48:34,873 --> 00:48:37,084
produces 10,000
gallons of saliva
in their lifetime?

1046
00:48:37,209 --> 00:48:40,796
Did you know that I produce
10,000 gallons of saliva
in one kiss?

1047
00:48:40,921 --> 00:48:41,839
Eww. That's disgusting.

1048
00:48:41,964 --> 00:48:43,465
I'm going to show you.
Come here.

1049
00:48:43,590 --> 00:48:44,842
I'm serious.
I'm serious about this.

1050
00:48:44,967 --> 00:48:46,844
I don't like sloppy kisses.

1051
00:48:59,940 --> 00:49:03,652
<i>♪ Some love
makes you helpless ♪</i>

1052
00:49:03,777 --> 00:49:08,866
<i>♪ Some love
makes you strong ♪</i>

1053
00:49:08,991 --> 00:49:12,995
<i>♪ And some love
makes you do right ♪</i>

1054
00:49:13,120 --> 00:49:15,998
<i>♪ And some love
make you do wrong ♪</i>

1055
00:49:19,001 --> 00:49:20,752
Are you trying
to unhook my bra?

1056
00:49:20,878 --> 00:49:24,173
No. No.
I wouldn't do that. No.

1057
00:49:24,298 --> 00:49:26,633
Why not?
Am I not your type?

1058
00:49:26,758 --> 00:49:28,760
You are definitely my type.

1059
00:49:28,886 --> 00:49:29,887
What's your type?

1060
00:49:30,012 --> 00:49:32,598
Black and blue,
riddled with bandages.

1061
00:49:34,016 --> 00:49:36,977
And braless. Yeah.
Definitely braless.

1062
00:49:37,102 --> 00:49:40,022
<i>♪ I'm gonna
give it to you ♪</i>

1063
00:49:40,147 --> 00:49:41,982
<i>♪ Oh, baby ♪</i>

1064
00:49:42,107 --> 00:49:45,986
<i>♪ Ooh-ooh, my love ♪</i>

1065
00:49:46,111 --> 00:49:48,989
<i>♪ I'm gonna
give it to you ♪</i>

1066
00:49:49,114 --> 00:49:50,991
<i>♪ Oh, baby ♪</i>

1067
00:49:51,116 --> 00:49:52,576
<i>♪ Ooh-ooh ♪</i>

1068
00:49:52,701 --> 00:49:54,786
Your move.

1069
00:49:54,912 --> 00:49:55,996
<i>♪ My love ♪</i>

1070
00:49:56,121 --> 00:49:59,249
<i>♪ I'm gonna
give it to you ♪</i>

1071
00:49:59,374 --> 00:50:00,417
<i>♪ Oh, baby ♪</i>

1072
00:50:00,542 --> 00:50:01,752
That's it?

1073
00:50:01,877 --> 00:50:03,170
Socks are next.
Slow down.

1074
00:50:03,295 --> 00:50:04,922
Wuss.

1075
00:50:09,843 --> 00:50:11,220
You really want to do this?

1076
00:50:11,345 --> 00:50:13,847
I mean, you really want
to take us further?

1077
00:50:17,643 --> 00:50:19,895
<i>♪ Now, I'm no professor,
baby ♪</i>

1078
00:50:22,147 --> 00:50:24,566
<i>♪ But I--
I know a few things ♪</i>

1079
00:50:24,691 --> 00:50:25,484
<i>♪ Mm, yeah ♪</i>

1080
00:50:25,609 --> 00:50:26,777
[beeping]

1081
00:50:26,902 --> 00:50:28,737
This is not happening.

1082
00:50:31,323 --> 00:50:32,199
[beeping]

1083
00:50:32,324 --> 00:50:33,951
I got to get it.

1084
00:50:34,076 --> 00:50:35,953
It's-- It's
my emergency line.

1085
00:50:36,078 --> 00:50:36,954
No. No.

1086
00:50:37,079 --> 00:50:38,956
I got to get it.
I'll be back.

1087
00:50:39,081 --> 00:50:39,957
I'll be fast.

1088
00:50:44,086 --> 00:50:45,003
Dr. Logan speaking.

1089
00:50:45,128 --> 00:50:46,964
<i>[Stu]
Dude!</i>

1090
00:50:47,089 --> 00:50:48,340
Ahem.

1091
00:50:48,465 --> 00:50:50,342
Is this an emergency?

1092
00:50:50,467 --> 00:50:51,969
You're going to want
to hear this, man.

1093
00:50:52,094 --> 00:50:55,180
Well, I am rather busy
right now.

1094
00:50:55,305 --> 00:50:56,473
Good night!

1095
00:50:56,598 --> 00:50:58,392
Whoa, whoa, wait.
Did you bone her yet?

1096
00:50:58,517 --> 00:51:01,353
Look, unless
this is an emergency,

1097
00:51:01,478 --> 00:51:03,856
call my office
in the morning.

1098
00:51:03,981 --> 00:51:05,983
Fine. You want
to lose her forever,

1099
00:51:06,108 --> 00:51:08,068
<i>you hang up the phone
right now.</i>

1100
00:51:08,193 --> 00:51:10,863
This is going to be
the best night
of your life.

1101
00:51:10,988 --> 00:51:12,656
<i>Are you still there?</i>

1102
00:51:12,781 --> 00:51:15,993
<i>Chuck. Are you there?</i>

1103
00:51:16,118 --> 00:51:17,494
What are you
talking about?

1104
00:51:17,619 --> 00:51:19,872
<i>Dude,
it's that charm thing.</i>

1105
00:51:19,997 --> 00:51:22,374
<i>It turns out it's real!</i>

1106
00:51:22,499 --> 00:51:26,170
No. That's not true
because you told me
yourself--

1107
00:51:26,295 --> 00:51:28,005
Uh-uh, but now I believe.

1108
00:51:28,130 --> 00:51:29,673
I started
calling all your exes.

1109
00:51:29,798 --> 00:51:31,049
They're married.

1110
00:51:31,175 --> 00:51:33,051
<i>Not just some. All.</i>

1111
00:51:33,177 --> 00:51:35,012
<i>A to Z
on your Palm Pilot, man.</i>

1112
00:51:35,137 --> 00:51:37,097
<i>Susan Agrezzi
to Jeannie Zeigert.</i>

1113
00:51:37,222 --> 00:51:39,349
<i>Every single one
you closed the deal with.</i>

1114
00:51:39,474 --> 00:51:42,019
And did you see this month's
high school newsletter?

1115
00:51:42,144 --> 00:51:43,437
Sarah McDowell.

1116
00:51:43,562 --> 00:51:45,230
What, the girl
I lost my virginity to?

1117
00:51:45,355 --> 00:51:47,024
<i>Did you see who she
wound up marrying?</i>

1118
00:51:47,149 --> 00:51:48,901
Tony Lamberto,

1119
00:51:49,026 --> 00:51:50,861
that douche bag
she dumped you for!

1120
00:51:50,986 --> 00:51:54,031
<i>You know what this means,
don't you?</i>

1121
00:51:54,156 --> 00:51:55,199
<i>You shake the sheets
with Cam,</i>

1122
00:51:55,324 --> 00:51:57,409
<i>she's going to marry
the next guy she dates.</i>

1123
00:51:58,952 --> 00:52:01,413
This-- This--

1124
00:52:01,538 --> 00:52:03,040
I hate you.

1125
00:52:03,165 --> 00:52:05,542
I really hate you!

1126
00:52:09,755 --> 00:52:11,548
I got to go. I got to go.

1127
00:52:11,673 --> 00:52:13,342
A dental emergency.

1128
00:52:13,467 --> 00:52:15,719
Freak accident.

1129
00:52:15,844 --> 00:52:18,222
Children, they thought
it was gumballs.

1130
00:52:18,347 --> 00:52:20,098
Ball bearings,

1131
00:52:20,224 --> 00:52:22,476
and it just fucked up
their shit.

1132
00:52:22,601 --> 00:52:23,894
Uh...

1133
00:52:24,019 --> 00:52:25,896
you look great.
I had a good time.

1134
00:52:26,021 --> 00:52:27,105
I got to go.

1135
00:52:29,191 --> 00:52:31,068
I got to go!
[groaning]

1136
00:52:31,193 --> 00:52:32,694
[door closes]

1137
00:52:32,819 --> 00:52:34,696
I can't believe you're
really considering doing this.

1138
00:52:34,821 --> 00:52:36,865
If you believe it
and everyone else
believes it,

1139
00:52:36,990 --> 00:52:38,075
what else can I do?

1140
00:52:38,200 --> 00:52:39,159
Anything but this.

1141
00:52:39,284 --> 00:52:40,494
I got to be sure.

1142
00:52:40,619 --> 00:52:42,454
I've got to put the curse
to the test.

1143
00:52:42,579 --> 00:52:44,665
Where is she?

1144
00:52:44,790 --> 00:52:46,333
She's
beached over there

1145
00:52:46,458 --> 00:52:49,670
by the giant garbage bag
full of doughnut holes.

1146
00:52:49,795 --> 00:52:52,130
Eleanor Skepple.

1147
00:52:52,256 --> 00:52:55,717
She's angry, rude,
and she smells bad.

1148
00:52:55,843 --> 00:52:57,553
In addition to back acne,

1149
00:52:57,678 --> 00:53:01,932
she's got front acne
and side acne.

1150
00:53:02,057 --> 00:53:04,101
You see that glass
of water there?

1151
00:53:04,226 --> 00:53:06,103
She keeps her teeth
in that glass.

1152
00:53:06,228 --> 00:53:09,982
So you're saying
that she's single.

1153
00:53:10,107 --> 00:53:11,400
She's your best bet, man.

1154
00:53:11,525 --> 00:53:13,110
You sink the soldier
all you want.

1155
00:53:13,235 --> 00:53:14,736
This chick ain't never
getting married.

1156
00:53:14,862 --> 00:53:17,155
If she was the last woman
on the face of the earth,

1157
00:53:17,281 --> 00:53:19,992
humanity would come
to a screeching halt.

1158
00:53:20,117 --> 00:53:21,243
[gags]

1159
00:53:35,716 --> 00:53:37,426
Ahem.

1160
00:53:37,551 --> 00:53:40,971
Hey, asshole,
got my peanut butter?

1161
00:53:41,096 --> 00:53:44,516
No. My name's Charlie.

1162
00:53:49,271 --> 00:53:51,023
I'm sorry.
I was just wondering

1163
00:53:51,148 --> 00:53:54,109
if, um-- if I could
take you out tonight.

1164
00:53:54,234 --> 00:53:56,862
How does that--
How does that sound?

1165
00:53:58,030 --> 00:53:59,823
- [fart]
- Ahh...

1166
00:53:59,948 --> 00:54:01,950
You want me to elaborate?

1167
00:54:02,075 --> 00:54:04,036
No. I get your drift.

1168
00:54:04,161 --> 00:54:05,662
I'm sorry
to have bothered you.

1169
00:54:12,753 --> 00:54:15,214
Pay you a hundred dollars
to go out with me tonight.

1170
00:54:17,966 --> 00:54:19,343
$200.

1171
00:54:21,678 --> 00:54:22,971
Make me happy.

1172
00:54:31,313 --> 00:54:32,481
So a thousand dollars,

1173
00:54:32,606 --> 00:54:35,359
and all you have to do
is take me to dinner?

1174
00:54:36,777 --> 00:54:39,196
Well, actually, I thought
that maybe we could,

1175
00:54:39,321 --> 00:54:42,366
you know, we--
you and I could, uh--

1176
00:54:47,996 --> 00:54:49,248
get physical.

1177
00:54:49,373 --> 00:54:50,749
Hmm.

1178
00:54:50,874 --> 00:54:53,210
All right.

1179
00:54:53,335 --> 00:54:57,381
I'm gonna fuck you
till you die!

1180
00:55:04,012 --> 00:55:06,390
[bed creaking]

1181
00:55:10,435 --> 00:55:11,395
Grrr!

1182
00:55:15,941 --> 00:55:17,234
And now we wait.

1183
00:55:21,321 --> 00:55:25,492
Oh, Coco,
I know how you feel.

1184
00:55:25,617 --> 00:55:27,619
We just put ourselves
out there,

1185
00:55:27,744 --> 00:55:28,704
and what happened?

1186
00:55:28,829 --> 00:55:30,622
Got left hanging.

1187
00:55:30,747 --> 00:55:32,666
Huh, girl?

1188
00:55:32,791 --> 00:55:34,418
[gurgles]

1189
00:55:35,544 --> 00:55:37,254
Has he called yet?

1190
00:55:37,379 --> 00:55:40,048
No, Joe, he hasn't.

1191
00:55:40,174 --> 00:55:43,844
Thanks for asking.
I really appreciate it.

1192
00:55:43,969 --> 00:55:46,263
God, I feel so stupid.

1193
00:55:46,388 --> 00:55:48,599
Why did I act like that?

1194
00:55:50,058 --> 00:55:51,518
Why hasn't he called?

1195
00:55:51,643 --> 00:55:54,730
All this waiting
is driving me crazy.

1196
00:55:54,855 --> 00:55:58,775
You know, there's always
some madness in love.

1197
00:55:58,901 --> 00:56:04,448
But there's also always
some reason in madness.

1198
00:56:06,033 --> 00:56:07,784
Nietzsche.

1199
00:56:07,910 --> 00:56:09,745
Been using the pages
of this philosophy book

1200
00:56:09,870 --> 00:56:11,288
for rolling paper.

1201
00:56:11,413 --> 00:56:14,291
It's like I'm smoking
their thoughts.

1202
00:56:14,416 --> 00:56:16,251
[cell phone
"penguin call" ringing]

1203
00:56:21,298 --> 00:56:22,299
It's him.

1204
00:56:22,424 --> 00:56:24,301
Well, get it.

1205
00:56:24,426 --> 00:56:25,928
I'm gonna let it ring.

1206
00:56:27,930 --> 00:56:28,931
[ringing stops]

1207
00:56:29,056 --> 00:56:30,724
I'll screen it.

1208
00:56:30,849 --> 00:56:32,893
<i>Sorry I haven't called,
but I've been really sick.</i>

1209
00:56:33,018 --> 00:56:34,269
<i>[fake coughing]</i>

1210
00:56:34,394 --> 00:56:36,146
<i>I can't even get out of bed.</i>

1211
00:56:36,271 --> 00:56:38,732
<i>Do you think maybe we could
just talk on the phone</i>

1212
00:56:38,857 --> 00:56:39,775
<i>or on the computer?</i>

1213
00:56:39,900 --> 00:56:41,610
<i>[coughing]</i>

1214
00:56:41,735 --> 00:56:43,612
<i>I'd really, really like that.</i>

1215
00:56:43,737 --> 00:56:45,239
<i>[cough]
Call me.</i>

1216
00:56:48,534 --> 00:56:49,952
<i>♪ [pop]</i>

1217
00:56:57,543 --> 00:56:59,419
<i>♪ I found the switch ♪</i>

1218
00:56:59,545 --> 00:57:01,421
<i>♪ You turn it on ♪</i>

1219
00:57:01,547 --> 00:57:03,715
<i>♪ I hit the ditch ♪</i>

1220
00:57:03,841 --> 00:57:05,592
<i>♪ You carried on ♪</i>

1221
00:57:05,717 --> 00:57:08,011
<i>♪ I was so near ♪</i>

1222
00:57:08,136 --> 00:57:09,596
<i>♪ Now you're so far ♪</i>

1223
00:57:09,721 --> 00:57:11,682
<i>♪ Are you quite sure ♪</i>

1224
00:57:11,807 --> 00:57:13,141
<i>♪ Just who you are? ♪</i>

1225
00:57:13,267 --> 00:57:17,437
<i>♪ Oh, I, ah-ah, I, I ♪
am victim ♪</i>

1226
00:57:17,563 --> 00:57:21,066
<i>♪ With a coin that's got
a tail on either side ♪</i>

1227
00:57:21,191 --> 00:57:26,572
<i>♪ Oh, and I, ah-ah, I, I
am gonna be the one ♪</i>

1228
00:57:26,697 --> 00:57:29,241
<i>♪ Who makes you stop
and realize ♪</i>

1229
00:57:29,366 --> 00:57:33,412
<i>♪ You could have it all ♪</i>

1230
00:57:33,537 --> 00:57:37,875
<i>♪ Yeah,
we should have it all ♪</i>

1231
00:57:38,000 --> 00:57:42,254
<i>♪ I love it when you call,
I love it when you call ♪</i>

1232
00:57:42,379 --> 00:57:44,548
<i>♪ I love it when you call ♪</i>

1233
00:57:46,508 --> 00:57:48,302
<i>♪ See,
what's the complication? ♪</i>

1234
00:57:48,427 --> 00:57:50,470
<i>♪ It's only conversation ♪</i>

1235
00:57:50,596 --> 00:57:52,472
<i>♪ I love it when you call ♪</i>

1236
00:57:54,266 --> 00:57:55,475
<i>♪ Whoa, whoa ♪</i>

1237
00:57:55,601 --> 00:57:57,519
<i>♪ He loves it
when you call ♪</i>

1238
00:57:57,644 --> 00:58:01,940
<i>♪ He loves it
when you call ♪</i>

1239
00:58:08,155 --> 00:58:09,656
I can't pretend
to be sick forever.

1240
00:58:09,781 --> 00:58:11,283
Come on, man.
You're my hero.

1241
00:58:11,408 --> 00:58:12,701
- I don't know.
- Yeah, you gotta do
this for me.

1242
00:58:12,826 --> 00:58:14,786
You got this, my brother.
You're a crazy train.

1243
00:58:14,912 --> 00:58:16,413
You're the man
in the mirror.

1244
00:58:16,538 --> 00:58:18,373
You're a force of nature.
Hurricane Stu.

1245
00:58:18,498 --> 00:58:19,374
I can't do it.

1246
00:58:19,499 --> 00:58:20,501
You have to do it.

1247
00:58:20,626 --> 00:58:22,294
No one's
asked her out yet.

1248
00:58:22,419 --> 00:58:24,671
Yeah, right. So I go out
with Eleanor Skepple

1249
00:58:24,796 --> 00:58:25,797
to test your curse,

1250
00:58:25,923 --> 00:58:27,341
and what happens next?

1251
00:58:27,466 --> 00:58:29,009
I'm walking down the aisle
with Shamu!

1252
00:58:29,134 --> 00:58:30,260
I don't think so.

1253
00:58:30,385 --> 00:58:31,803
Do you see what I'm
doing here?

1254
00:58:33,305 --> 00:58:34,431
The friend card, man?

1255
00:58:34,556 --> 00:58:35,474
Yeah.

1256
00:58:35,599 --> 00:58:36,683
That's mean.

1257
00:58:36,808 --> 00:58:38,727
You leave me
no choice.

1258
00:58:40,604 --> 00:58:43,440
Give me that,
you son of a bitch.

1259
00:58:43,565 --> 00:58:45,275
If I marry her, Chuck,

1260
00:58:45,400 --> 00:58:47,611
we're going to hunt you down
and eat you.

1261
00:59:00,582 --> 00:59:01,834
Ahh!

1262
00:59:01,959 --> 00:59:02,876
Yeah, Stu.

1263
00:59:07,589 --> 00:59:09,258
I can't believe
you're still sick.

1264
00:59:09,383 --> 00:59:10,717
How long has it been?

1265
00:59:10,843 --> 00:59:12,636
Two weeks. It's, uh...

1266
00:59:12,761 --> 00:59:14,263
it's killing me,
but, you know,

1267
00:59:14,388 --> 00:59:15,472
I don't
want to infect you.

1268
00:59:15,597 --> 00:59:17,599
At this point,
I wouldn't mind.

1269
00:59:19,893 --> 00:59:21,562
You know, I feel
like a kid again.

1270
00:59:21,687 --> 00:59:23,480
I haven't talked
on the phone this much

1271
00:59:23,605 --> 00:59:25,065
since
I was in high school.

1272
00:59:25,190 --> 00:59:26,441
Oh, that reminds me.

1273
00:59:26,567 --> 00:59:30,571
Uh, would you
go to the prom with me?

1274
00:59:30,696 --> 00:59:31,905
Can I ask you something?

1275
00:59:32,030 --> 00:59:33,156
Yeah.

1276
00:59:33,282 --> 00:59:36,410
<i>I get the feeling that...</i>

1277
00:59:36,535 --> 00:59:39,746
Well, are you avoiding
actually seeing me?

1278
00:59:39,872 --> 00:59:43,375
No, Cam. Are you kidding?
I'm dying to see you.

1279
00:59:43,500 --> 00:59:46,378
Then come over.
Right now. Wash my back.

1280
00:59:46,503 --> 00:59:48,130
<i>Come on.</i>

1281
00:59:48,255 --> 00:59:50,299
I'll wear a mask.
You could wear a mask.

1282
00:59:50,424 --> 00:59:51,300
We'll play doctor.

1283
00:59:51,425 --> 00:59:53,969
Ooh, boy. I want to,

1284
00:59:54,094 --> 00:59:55,387
but with the-- [cough]

1285
00:59:55,512 --> 00:59:56,930
No buts.
I need to see you.

1286
00:59:57,055 --> 00:59:59,183
I need to see if that
birthmark you have

1287
00:59:59,308 --> 01:00:00,309
really looks
like Alfred Hitchcock.

1288
01:00:00,434 --> 01:00:02,352
Now, wait. No. That--

1289
01:00:02,477 --> 01:00:04,521
That is a restricted area, okay?

1290
01:00:04,646 --> 01:00:05,814
Not everybody gets a peek

1291
01:00:05,939 --> 01:00:07,357
at the, uh,
Master of Suspense,

1292
01:00:07,482 --> 01:00:08,609
if you know
what I'm saying.

1293
01:00:08,734 --> 01:00:09,943
If I can't see you,

1294
01:00:10,068 --> 01:00:11,361
we should take
our phone relationship

1295
01:00:11,486 --> 01:00:12,696
to the next level.

1296
01:00:13,655 --> 01:00:14,740
What do you mean?

1297
01:00:14,865 --> 01:00:18,535
<i>Mm... Oh, yeah.</i>

1298
01:00:18,660 --> 01:00:20,495
<i>That feels good.</i>

1299
01:00:20,621 --> 01:00:23,165
I like that.
Do you like that?

1300
01:00:23,290 --> 01:00:24,499
<i>Like what?</i>

1301
01:00:24,625 --> 01:00:25,709
That's my phone sex voice.

1302
01:00:25,834 --> 01:00:29,254
<i>Come on, Charlie,
work with me here.</i>

1303
01:00:29,379 --> 01:00:32,257
I want to. I just don't
think that we should do that.

1304
01:00:32,382 --> 01:00:34,176
<i>I mean,
nothing to do with--</i>

1305
01:00:34,301 --> 01:00:35,552
Does your phone
receive pictures?

1306
01:00:35,677 --> 01:00:36,553
Yeah, why?

1307
01:00:36,678 --> 01:00:37,554
<i>Sending.</i>

1308
01:00:37,679 --> 01:00:38,847
Sending?

1309
01:00:38,972 --> 01:00:40,724
What are you sending to me?

1310
01:00:42,100 --> 01:00:42,976
Fuck!

1311
01:00:43,101 --> 01:00:45,103
[burbling]

1312
01:00:45,229 --> 01:00:46,438
I got it.
<i>Got it?</i>

1313
01:00:46,563 --> 01:00:48,232
I'm done for the night.
Thank you.

1314
01:00:48,357 --> 01:00:49,191
<i>- [giggling]</i>
- [beep]

1315
01:00:49,316 --> 01:00:50,567
Oh, God.
Hold on one second.

1316
01:00:50,692 --> 01:00:51,568
Stu, what's up?

1317
01:00:51,693 --> 01:00:53,070
[pop]

1318
01:00:53,195 --> 01:00:55,364
The deed is done.

1319
01:00:55,489 --> 01:00:57,449
I went out
with Eleanor Skepple.

1320
01:00:57,574 --> 01:00:59,243
I'm not proposing to her,

1321
01:00:59,368 --> 01:01:01,495
so you're in the clear.

1322
01:01:03,121 --> 01:01:04,122
Are you there?

1323
01:01:04,248 --> 01:01:05,749
<i>Chuck?</i>

1324
01:01:10,796 --> 01:01:11,797
I feel better.

1325
01:01:37,614 --> 01:01:38,782
Ow! Oh!

1326
01:01:40,742 --> 01:01:42,160
- Aah!
- [crash]

1327
01:02:00,804 --> 01:02:02,598
Camcorder in the bedroom, huh?

1328
01:02:02,723 --> 01:02:03,765
Kinky.

1329
01:02:10,147 --> 01:02:12,858
So, for the, uh, camera,

1330
01:02:12,983 --> 01:02:15,360
do I have to sign a waiver
or something, you know,

1331
01:02:15,485 --> 01:02:16,695
for internet purposes?

1332
01:02:16,820 --> 01:02:18,405
You really want
to talk right now?

1333
01:02:19,781 --> 01:02:21,700
Whoa, those are nice.

1334
01:02:21,825 --> 01:02:23,785
Oh, God bless you.

1335
01:02:24,786 --> 01:02:25,662
[cough]

1336
01:02:25,787 --> 01:02:26,663
You pushed me.

1337
01:02:26,788 --> 01:02:28,582
Sorry.
It's been a while.

1338
01:02:28,707 --> 01:02:30,834
I can see I'm going
to have to wear protection.

1339
01:02:30,959 --> 01:02:32,836
[giggling]

1340
01:02:54,316 --> 01:02:56,318
Stop staring at me.

1341
01:02:56,443 --> 01:02:58,862
You're
creeping me out.

1342
01:03:28,100 --> 01:03:29,935
<i>[Announcer]
...no matter
what your size.</i>

1343
01:03:30,060 --> 01:03:31,687
<i>You will not
go to waste.</i>

1344
01:03:31,812 --> 01:03:33,146
<i>Sometimes it takes
a little love</i>

1345
01:03:33,272 --> 01:03:35,732
<i>to make someone want
to shed the pounds.</i>

1346
01:03:35,858 --> 01:03:37,860
<i>Two main reasons--</i>

1347
01:03:45,534 --> 01:03:47,744
[ring]

1348
01:03:47,870 --> 01:03:49,162
What the hell?

1349
01:03:49,288 --> 01:03:52,541
[ring]

1350
01:03:52,666 --> 01:03:53,750
Hello.

1351
01:03:53,876 --> 01:03:56,211
The deed is done?
The deed is done?

1352
01:03:56,336 --> 01:03:57,546
I thought you said

1353
01:03:57,671 --> 01:03:58,755
<i>you went out
with Eleanor Skepple.</i>

1354
01:03:58,881 --> 01:04:00,215
No, man. I just said that.

1355
01:04:00,340 --> 01:04:02,009
What?

1356
01:04:02,134 --> 01:04:03,552
I didn't want to risk it.

1357
01:04:03,677 --> 01:04:05,012
Marrying her?
Are you stupid?

1358
01:04:05,137 --> 01:04:06,430
But I saw you, man.

1359
01:04:06,555 --> 01:04:07,931
You-- You--
You asked her out.

1360
01:04:08,056 --> 01:04:10,058
No, man. I asked her
what time it was.

1361
01:04:10,184 --> 01:04:11,935
<i>She said it was 3:53.
[yawn]</i>

1362
01:04:14,897 --> 01:04:16,607
I can't believe
that I trusted you, Stu.

1363
01:04:16,732 --> 01:04:17,608
You fucked me!

1364
01:04:17,733 --> 01:04:18,775
Take out your friend card.

1365
01:04:18,901 --> 01:04:20,861
What?

1366
01:04:20,986 --> 01:04:23,071
Take out your friend card now
and rip it up

1367
01:04:23,197 --> 01:04:24,656
because you fucked me, Stu.

1368
01:04:24,781 --> 01:04:27,367
Oh, buddy, she's just a girl.

1369
01:04:27,492 --> 01:04:30,829
No. It's not <i>a</i> girl.

1370
01:04:33,498 --> 01:04:34,666
It's <i>the</i> girl.

1371
01:04:34,791 --> 01:04:37,211
Now I'm going to lose her.

1372
01:04:40,756 --> 01:04:42,966
I'm not going to lose her.

1373
01:04:50,724 --> 01:04:52,851
Breakfast in bed.

1374
01:04:54,019 --> 01:04:58,065
Wake up! Good morning!
It's a beautiful day!

1375
01:04:58,190 --> 01:04:59,942
Wow.

1376
01:05:00,067 --> 01:05:02,069
Am I supposed to eat
my way out of here?

1377
01:05:02,194 --> 01:05:04,071
I walked into the supermarket.

1378
01:05:04,196 --> 01:05:06,532
I stood there. I was like,
"What does Cam want?"

1379
01:05:06,657 --> 01:05:08,450
And I couldn't stop.

1380
01:05:08,575 --> 01:05:10,827
I was like "She'll want
that and that and that,"
and I got it all.

1381
01:05:10,953 --> 01:05:12,746
They didn't have Spam, though.

1382
01:05:12,871 --> 01:05:14,831
They won't have it in
until next week.
Anyway, enjoy.

1383
01:05:14,957 --> 01:05:16,708
Are you okay?

1384
01:05:16,834 --> 01:05:17,918
I am fantastic.
I feel like--

1385
01:05:18,043 --> 01:05:19,878
I did this-- ahh!

1386
01:05:20,003 --> 01:05:22,297
And then I gave myself
one of these. Look.

1387
01:05:22,422 --> 01:05:24,341
And I made out
with myself. Mmm!

1388
01:05:24,466 --> 01:05:25,801
You're acting kind of strange.

1389
01:05:25,926 --> 01:05:27,261
No. No, no.

1390
01:05:29,263 --> 01:05:31,265
Yeah, eat up. Eat up.
Try that. Try that.

1391
01:05:31,390 --> 01:05:32,724
Eat up.

1392
01:05:32,850 --> 01:05:34,852
Hey, um,
what are your plans

1393
01:05:34,977 --> 01:05:36,520
for the rest of, uh, today?

1394
01:05:36,645 --> 01:05:38,856
I'm going to work.

1395
01:05:38,981 --> 01:05:40,816
I'm going to go
to work with you!

1396
01:05:40,941 --> 01:05:42,025
I'm going to hang out.

1397
01:05:42,150 --> 01:05:44,736
I got it all planned out.
I'm going to go.

1398
01:05:44,862 --> 01:05:46,738
Ha ha ha ha!
I'm kidding.

1399
01:05:46,864 --> 01:05:48,907
I'm not going
to work with you.

1400
01:05:49,032 --> 01:05:50,784
Actually, Saturday.
What are you plans
for Saturday-- Sunday?

1401
01:05:50,909 --> 01:05:52,035
What are your plans
for Sunday?

1402
01:05:52,160 --> 01:05:53,537
Don't even answer that

1403
01:05:53,662 --> 01:05:54,872
because I'm already
thinking about Wednesday.

1404
01:05:54,997 --> 01:05:56,164
What are you doing
Wednesday?

1405
01:05:56,290 --> 01:05:57,708
Let's just seal it
right now--

1406
01:05:57,833 --> 01:05:58,876
seal the deal--

1407
01:05:59,001 --> 01:06:00,460
then I'll do
my pineapple dance.

1408
01:06:00,586 --> 01:06:01,461
Yes, Wednesday?

1409
01:06:01,587 --> 01:06:02,504
Ring-a-ding-a-ding
a-ding-a-ding.

1410
01:06:02,629 --> 01:06:04,089
Ring-a-ding-a-ding
a-ding-a-ding.

1411
01:06:04,214 --> 01:06:06,717
This is your fault!
Everything!

1412
01:06:06,842 --> 01:06:08,051
You!

1413
01:06:09,511 --> 01:06:11,388
You! Whoo!

1414
01:06:11,513 --> 01:06:14,099
Jesus Christ, why me?

1415
01:06:14,224 --> 01:06:17,060
Just shut your lips,
Stu. Shut up!

1416
01:06:19,479 --> 01:06:21,565
Hi, Cam. What's up?
It's Charlie.

1417
01:06:21,690 --> 01:06:22,566
How are you doing
today?

1418
01:06:22,691 --> 01:06:23,901
I just wanted to call

1419
01:06:24,026 --> 01:06:25,903
and make sure I had
the right number,

1420
01:06:26,028 --> 01:06:28,488
and I do, and I do.

1421
01:06:28,614 --> 01:06:29,573
How are you doing?

1422
01:06:29,698 --> 01:06:31,074
Having a good day
at work?

1423
01:06:31,200 --> 01:06:32,826
Well, I'll let you
get back,

1424
01:06:32,951 --> 01:06:34,077
but I wanted
to remind you,

1425
01:06:34,203 --> 01:06:36,997
Wednesday night,
you and me, happily.

1426
01:06:37,122 --> 01:06:39,082
All right. I'll talk
to you later. Bye.

1427
01:06:39,208 --> 01:06:40,542
This is your fault!

1428
01:06:40,667 --> 01:06:41,919
His!

1429
01:06:46,048 --> 01:06:48,509
You already ate.
Why are you--

1430
01:06:58,393 --> 01:07:01,104
Is there something different
in here since lunch?

1431
01:07:09,696 --> 01:07:11,114
Oh!

1432
01:07:12,950 --> 01:07:13,909
[knock on door]

1433
01:07:20,707 --> 01:07:22,584
[four-part harmony]
♪ Da da ♪

1434
01:07:22,709 --> 01:07:23,794
♪ Da da da da ♪

1435
01:07:23,919 --> 01:07:25,379
♪ Da da ♪

1436
01:07:25,504 --> 01:07:26,797
♪ Da da da da ♪

1437
01:07:26,922 --> 01:07:29,216
♪ Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh,
banana ♪

1438
01:07:29,341 --> 01:07:31,969
♪ Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh,
banana ♪

1439
01:07:32,094 --> 01:07:34,638
♪ Got me lookin'
so crazy right now ♪

1440
01:07:34,763 --> 01:07:37,599
♪ Your love's got me
lookin' so crazy right now ♪

1441
01:07:37,724 --> 01:07:40,227
♪ Got me lookin'
so crazy right now ♪

1442
01:07:40,352 --> 01:07:42,980
♪ Your touch has got me
lookin' so crazy right now ♪

1443
01:07:43,105 --> 01:07:45,899
♪ Got me hopin'
you'd page me right now ♪

1444
01:07:46,024 --> 01:07:49,111
♪ Your kiss got me hopin'
you'd save me right now ♪

1445
01:07:49,236 --> 01:07:51,488
♪ Lookin' so crazy,
your love's got me lookin' ♪

1446
01:07:51,613 --> 01:07:56,034
♪ Got me lookin' so crazy,
your love ♪

1447
01:07:56,159 --> 01:07:58,245
Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, got it.

1448
01:07:58,370 --> 01:08:00,205
♪ Got me going,
so pay me right now, whew ♪

1449
01:08:00,330 --> 01:08:01,999
♪ Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh ♪

1450
01:08:02,124 --> 01:08:04,501
Raise the habitat.

1451
01:08:04,626 --> 01:08:06,587
♪ Mm-mm, crazy, crazy, crazy ♪

1452
01:08:06,712 --> 01:08:09,047
♪ Crazy for you ♪

1453
01:08:11,091 --> 01:08:11,884
Changed my mind.

1454
01:08:12,009 --> 01:08:13,969
Took the day off
so I could hang.

1455
01:08:14,344 --> 01:08:16,847
I won't be in the way.
I know what you're thinking.
I'm going to be in the way.

1456
01:08:16,972 --> 01:08:18,849
But I think
I'm going to blend in,
like this.

1457
01:08:18,974 --> 01:08:20,017
I think I'll blend. Look.

1458
01:08:20,142 --> 01:08:22,019
I know how to do that.

1459
01:08:22,144 --> 01:08:25,314
Charlie, I'm working.

1460
01:08:31,153 --> 01:08:33,030
Or I could go.

1461
01:08:33,155 --> 01:08:34,323
Yeah, I--

1462
01:08:37,159 --> 01:08:38,243
Get out of here.

1463
01:08:40,245 --> 01:08:41,455
No, no.

1464
01:08:41,580 --> 01:08:42,456
Thanks.

1465
01:08:51,173 --> 01:08:52,674
Have a great day at work.

1466
01:08:53,634 --> 01:08:55,469
My car's this way.

1467
01:09:08,732 --> 01:09:10,067
Hi, Cam.

1468
01:09:16,990 --> 01:09:18,075
Ding-ding-ding-ding-ding!

1469
01:09:18,200 --> 01:09:20,077
Work is done. Time for fun.

1470
01:09:20,202 --> 01:09:22,246
Woo-hoo!

1471
01:09:23,956 --> 01:09:25,249
Hey.

1472
01:09:27,334 --> 01:09:28,710
Listen, I know
an amazing sushi place,

1473
01:09:28,836 --> 01:09:30,128
and the best part of all:

1474
01:09:30,254 --> 01:09:31,505
when you're finished
with your leftovers,

1475
01:09:31,630 --> 01:09:33,924
they put them
in a doggie bag--
or a penguin bag.

1476
01:09:34,049 --> 01:09:35,467
- Charlie--
- Oh, you don't like sushi.

1477
01:09:35,592 --> 01:09:37,344
Uh, Thai? Indian.

1478
01:09:37,469 --> 01:09:40,097
Listen to me, you need
to leave me alone, okay?

1479
01:09:40,222 --> 01:09:41,473
I need some space.

1480
01:09:44,226 --> 01:09:45,394
So tonight is no good.

1481
01:09:45,519 --> 01:09:49,523
I'm very close
to changing my phone number.

1482
01:09:49,648 --> 01:09:51,233
Do you understand?

1483
01:10:08,375 --> 01:10:10,377
If you were a hamburger
at McDonald's,

1484
01:10:10,502 --> 01:10:12,629
I'd name you my McBeautiful
Tittie Sandwich

1485
01:10:12,754 --> 01:10:14,256
With Titties On Top.

1486
01:10:28,103 --> 01:10:29,730
- Can I see Stu?
- Just a sec--

1487
01:10:29,855 --> 01:10:31,106
Yeah.

1488
01:10:31,231 --> 01:10:33,901
Stu, I need you.
It's important.

1489
01:10:34,026 --> 01:10:36,153
I'm Dr. Charlie Logan.

1490
01:10:36,278 --> 01:10:38,947
I don't know who this Stu
is you speak of.

1491
01:10:46,079 --> 01:10:47,122
Ooh!

1492
01:10:49,291 --> 01:10:50,167
Call me.

1493
01:10:50,292 --> 01:10:51,168
I need your help.

1494
01:10:51,293 --> 01:10:53,170
Hey, are we still friends?

1495
01:10:53,295 --> 01:10:55,255
Cam is going to fall in love

1496
01:10:55,380 --> 01:10:58,050
with a get married to
the next guy she goes
on a date with, right?

1497
01:10:58,175 --> 01:11:00,135
I'm going to be that next guy.

1498
01:11:00,260 --> 01:11:01,803
Yeah.
You're a plastic surgeon.

1499
01:11:01,929 --> 01:11:04,598
You're going to...
change my face up.

1500
01:11:04,723 --> 01:11:06,975
I don't care if you
give me a beak.

1501
01:11:07,100 --> 01:11:08,852
I'm going to look
like a different guy.

1502
01:11:08,977 --> 01:11:10,062
That way,
when I meet her--

1503
01:11:10,187 --> 01:11:11,188
Hi. My name's Ronald--

1504
01:11:11,313 --> 01:11:13,440
I'm the new guy
she falls in love with.

1505
01:11:13,565 --> 01:11:14,691
Let's go. Right now.

1506
01:11:14,816 --> 01:11:16,944
Don't look at me
in that tone of voice.

1507
01:11:17,069 --> 01:11:19,488
I'm talking the truth.
Please?

1508
01:11:19,613 --> 01:11:21,615
Chuck...

1509
01:11:21,740 --> 01:11:23,659
take a look around, man.

1510
01:11:23,784 --> 01:11:26,495
I mean, I can give you tits.
You want tits?

1511
01:11:26,620 --> 01:11:29,373
So you're
not going to help me.

1512
01:11:29,498 --> 01:11:32,960
Yes, but not by
rearranging your face, man.

1513
01:11:33,085 --> 01:11:34,628
Come here. Have a seat.

1514
01:11:36,171 --> 01:11:37,256
There's got to be
a better way, right?

1515
01:11:37,381 --> 01:11:38,423
Oh.

1516
01:11:38,549 --> 01:11:40,217
I mean, I know
things are bad now,

1517
01:11:40,342 --> 01:11:43,220
but things could be
a lot worse, right?

1518
01:11:43,345 --> 01:11:46,056
Listen, you could be
like my cousin, man.

1519
01:11:46,181 --> 01:11:47,683
He found out last week

1520
01:11:47,808 --> 01:11:49,351
he's got an inoperable
brain tumor.

1521
01:11:51,353 --> 01:11:52,229
That's horrible.

1522
01:11:52,354 --> 01:11:53,647
Yeah.

1523
01:11:53,772 --> 01:11:55,607
He's only got, like,
one week left to live.

1524
01:11:55,732 --> 01:11:57,609
Uh, well,

1525
01:11:57,734 --> 01:12:00,654
that is, uh...

1526
01:12:00,779 --> 01:12:02,489
perfect.

1527
01:12:02,614 --> 01:12:04,533
That's perfect. He's
the perfect guy for her.

1528
01:12:04,658 --> 01:12:05,534
What?

1529
01:12:05,659 --> 01:12:06,869
Yeah.
There's no harm, right?

1530
01:12:06,994 --> 01:12:08,453
He gets laid.
She falls in love.

1531
01:12:08,579 --> 01:12:09,830
He's dead within a week.

1532
01:12:09,955 --> 01:12:11,164
I swoop in, console her.

1533
01:12:11,290 --> 01:12:12,249
Bing-bang-boom,
everybody's happy.

1534
01:12:12,374 --> 01:12:13,250
Hey!

1535
01:12:13,375 --> 01:12:14,543
Why don't you club her

1536
01:12:14,668 --> 01:12:15,961
and have
a wedding ceremony

1537
01:12:16,086 --> 01:12:17,004
while she's knocked
unconscious?

1538
01:12:17,129 --> 01:12:18,422
That'd work!

1539
01:12:20,299 --> 01:12:22,259
What the hell
is wrong with you?

1540
01:12:22,384 --> 01:12:26,180
You have to let her go.

1541
01:12:26,305 --> 01:12:29,433
That's the one thing
I can't do.

1542
01:12:33,562 --> 01:12:35,439
[making penguin noises]

1543
01:13:01,340 --> 01:13:02,549
- Next time I'll bring my suit.
- Yeah!

1544
01:13:02,674 --> 01:13:04,259
Oh, no.

1545
01:13:04,384 --> 01:13:06,220
Oh, no. That's not good.

1546
01:13:11,433 --> 01:13:12,518
No.

1547
01:13:12,643 --> 01:13:14,937
It's over.

1548
01:13:15,062 --> 01:13:16,313
That has to be George.

1549
01:13:16,438 --> 01:13:18,482
George.

1550
01:13:20,859 --> 01:13:22,528
Hey, George!

1551
01:13:22,653 --> 01:13:24,363
What's up, George?
Huh?

1552
01:13:24,488 --> 01:13:25,989
- How you doing, George?
- I'm not George.

1553
01:13:26,114 --> 01:13:27,908
You're going to stay
away from Cam, all right?

1554
01:13:28,033 --> 01:13:30,327
You're going to stay away
from Cam, you hear me?

1555
01:13:30,452 --> 01:13:32,996
You're George!
Charlie!

1556
01:13:33,121 --> 01:13:34,581
- I'm not George!
- Cam!

1557
01:13:34,706 --> 01:13:35,999
What are you doing?

1558
01:13:36,124 --> 01:13:38,001
I just met George.
He's a real jerk.

1559
01:13:38,126 --> 01:13:39,336
You shouldn't like him.
I want to see you.

1560
01:13:39,461 --> 01:13:41,922
Stay away from me!
Stay away from me!

1561
01:13:42,047 --> 01:13:43,090
No!

1562
01:13:44,049 --> 01:13:46,260
Falling.

1563
01:13:47,928 --> 01:13:49,137
What is wrong with you?

1564
01:13:49,263 --> 01:13:50,597
Ow.

1565
01:13:50,722 --> 01:13:52,349
Ow!

1566
01:13:52,474 --> 01:13:54,560
Ow! I'm being bitten!

1567
01:13:54,685 --> 01:13:57,020
Does he have fish
in his pants?

1568
01:13:57,145 --> 01:13:58,772
Ow, ow! Ow, ow, ow!

1569
01:13:58,897 --> 01:14:00,023
[crunch]

1570
01:14:00,148 --> 01:14:02,359
Ow!

1571
01:14:02,484 --> 01:14:05,362
Oh, those fuckers
are vicious.

1572
01:14:05,487 --> 01:14:06,989
Yeah? Well,
they don't like it

1573
01:14:07,114 --> 01:14:08,448
when someone disturbs
their environment.

1574
01:14:08,574 --> 01:14:10,367
Time to go, buddy.

1575
01:14:10,492 --> 01:14:12,160
I know I've been acting crazy,
but there's a reasonable--

1576
01:14:12,286 --> 01:14:13,370
Let me guess, Charlie.

1577
01:14:13,495 --> 01:14:15,080
You believe
you're a lucky charm,

1578
01:14:15,205 --> 01:14:18,083
and you're afraid
I'm going to marry
the next guy I date,

1579
01:14:18,208 --> 01:14:19,251
so you've
been smothering me

1580
01:14:19,376 --> 01:14:20,419
and
attacking my friends.

1581
01:14:20,544 --> 01:14:21,670
What about George, okay?

1582
01:14:21,795 --> 01:14:23,463
What about
your date with George?

1583
01:14:23,589 --> 01:14:25,215
Wednesday night?
What big date with George?

1584
01:14:25,340 --> 01:14:26,967
George is my hairdresser!

1585
01:14:28,802 --> 01:14:31,638
Excuse me. I'm sorry.
I was eavesdropping.

1586
01:14:31,763 --> 01:14:33,390
Are you really
Charlie Logan
the lucky charm?

1587
01:14:33,515 --> 01:14:36,393
Because...
I was wondering--

1588
01:14:36,518 --> 01:14:38,270
I can't. I'm sorry.
Cam, listen.

1589
01:14:38,395 --> 01:14:39,271
No, no.
Cam--

1590
01:14:39,396 --> 01:14:40,564
Charlie,
I just don't think

1591
01:14:40,689 --> 01:14:41,565
- Don't say it.
- we can do this
anymore.

1592
01:14:41,690 --> 01:14:42,774
It's not working.

1593
01:14:42,900 --> 01:14:44,735
Please, Cam,
just don't say it's over.

1594
01:14:46,904 --> 01:14:48,155
It's over.

1595
01:15:17,017 --> 01:15:17,893
Dr. Charlie?

1596
01:15:18,018 --> 01:15:20,145
Hi, Reba.

1597
01:15:20,270 --> 01:15:21,980
I've been
calling you all day.

1598
01:15:22,105 --> 01:15:23,273
Where have you been?

1599
01:15:23,398 --> 01:15:25,484
Decided to take
another day off.

1600
01:15:25,609 --> 01:15:28,278
Hey, does our building
have roof access?

1601
01:15:28,403 --> 01:15:31,448
Oh,
things can't be that bad.

1602
01:15:31,573 --> 01:15:34,952
You know,
I owe you a thank-you.

1603
01:15:35,077 --> 01:15:37,829
I met a guy,
and he's wonderful.

1604
01:15:37,955 --> 01:15:39,456
I really think he's the one.

1605
01:15:39,581 --> 01:15:43,627
That's great.
I'm happy for you.

1606
01:15:45,087 --> 01:15:48,465
You've done a good thing,
Dr. Charlie.

1607
01:15:48,590 --> 01:15:51,760
Helping people find love.

1608
01:15:51,885 --> 01:15:54,638
It's great. Mm-hmm.

1609
01:15:56,598 --> 01:15:58,475
I bet you didn't think
you'd be responsible

1610
01:15:58,600 --> 01:16:00,102
for helping me
find true love again,

1611
01:16:00,227 --> 01:16:01,478
but you did.

1612
01:16:01,603 --> 01:16:03,397
You did, Dr. Charlie.

1613
01:16:14,241 --> 01:16:16,076
Dr. Charlie,
are you all right?

1614
01:16:16,201 --> 01:16:19,121
Love fall like rain.
I'm in pain.

1615
01:16:19,246 --> 01:16:20,497
She was right, Reba.

1616
01:16:20,622 --> 01:16:21,665
It's raining.

1617
01:16:21,790 --> 01:16:23,667
Oh, my God!

1618
01:16:27,629 --> 01:16:29,464
Stu, I need
to Google something.

1619
01:16:29,590 --> 01:16:30,507
Unacceptable!

1620
01:16:30,632 --> 01:16:32,009
Hey!

1621
01:16:32,134 --> 01:16:33,427
I wish
I hadn't seen that!

1622
01:16:33,552 --> 01:16:35,262
A man can't masturbate
in his own house?

1623
01:16:35,387 --> 01:16:36,680
That is disgusting.

1624
01:16:36,805 --> 01:16:38,182
It's a known fact

1625
01:16:38,307 --> 01:16:39,683
that stimulation
of the prostate--

1626
01:16:39,808 --> 01:16:42,102
No, no, no, no.
Just get dressed

1627
01:16:42,227 --> 01:16:43,604
and wash your hands!

1628
01:16:46,607 --> 01:16:48,525
All I know
is that I'm hexed.

1629
01:16:48,650 --> 01:16:51,403
Yeah. If by hexed
you mean bat-shit crazy,

1630
01:16:51,528 --> 01:16:52,362
then yeah,
you're hexed, man.

1631
01:16:52,487 --> 01:16:53,405
Don't you remember?

1632
01:16:53,530 --> 01:16:54,990
Black lipstick,
long fingernails.

1633
01:16:55,115 --> 01:16:56,783
A total freak.
She wanted me
to show her my penis.

1634
01:16:56,909 --> 01:16:58,535
I wouldn't,
so she pulled my nipples

1635
01:16:58,660 --> 01:17:00,204
and put a hex on me.

1636
01:17:00,329 --> 01:17:02,956
Stu, I've lost the most
special person of my life.

1637
01:17:03,081 --> 01:17:05,250
I have to break this spell.

1638
01:17:05,375 --> 01:17:07,377
You haven't lost me, dude.

1639
01:17:07,503 --> 01:17:08,545
I'm here for you
always.

1640
01:17:08,670 --> 01:17:10,547
Just drive the fucking car.

1641
01:17:14,301 --> 01:17:16,553
Oh, I'm so sorry, buddy.

1642
01:17:16,678 --> 01:17:17,888
[door opens]

1643
01:17:20,682 --> 01:17:23,018
Hey, what's up
with Chester?

1644
01:17:23,143 --> 01:17:25,020
His girlfriend Molly's
sick.

1645
01:17:25,145 --> 01:17:27,189
I sent her away
for treatment.

1646
01:17:27,314 --> 01:17:28,649
He stopped grooming himself.

1647
01:17:31,652 --> 01:17:33,278
It's heartbreaking,
you know?

1648
01:17:33,403 --> 01:17:34,571
If she doesn't come back,

1649
01:17:34,696 --> 01:17:37,157
he may never
find another mate.

1650
01:17:39,701 --> 01:17:41,411
[sigh]

1651
01:17:42,788 --> 01:17:46,834
Murphy, maybe
you reacted too harshly.

1652
01:17:46,959 --> 01:17:48,752
You should call him.

1653
01:17:48,877 --> 01:17:50,254
I can't, Joe.

1654
01:17:50,379 --> 01:17:52,422
You saw him. He's crazy.

1655
01:17:52,548 --> 01:17:55,425
Love does that
to you sometimes.

1656
01:17:55,551 --> 01:17:57,594
I don't want
another one of your
philosophy lessons, Joe.

1657
01:17:57,719 --> 01:17:59,596
He was smothering me.

1658
01:17:59,721 --> 01:18:01,765
I want to be
part of someone's life,

1659
01:18:01,890 --> 01:18:03,183
not all of it.

1660
01:18:03,308 --> 01:18:07,604
Have you taken a look
at your bedroom lately?

1661
01:18:07,729 --> 01:18:09,314
If you love something,

1662
01:18:09,439 --> 01:18:12,776
sometimes you just want
to be surrounded by it.

1663
01:18:20,367 --> 01:18:21,994
That's it. That's it.

1664
01:18:25,998 --> 01:18:28,834
How can I get her
to break the spell?

1665
01:18:28,959 --> 01:18:31,128
I don't know.
She wanted to look
at your penis, right?

1666
01:18:31,253 --> 01:18:32,629
That was a joke.

1667
01:18:32,754 --> 01:18:33,797
Chuck?

1668
01:18:35,757 --> 01:18:36,717
Chuck, that was a joke.

1669
01:18:37,926 --> 01:18:38,760
Oh, my God.

1670
01:18:45,559 --> 01:18:47,769
Hi. Uh, is your mother home?

1671
01:18:49,479 --> 01:18:52,024
Is your mother's name Anisha?

1672
01:18:52,149 --> 01:18:54,401
What's
with the 50 questions?

1673
01:18:54,526 --> 01:18:55,861
That was two questions.

1674
01:18:55,986 --> 01:18:57,196
It's a hyperbole.

1675
01:18:57,321 --> 01:18:58,655
Sweetheart, who is it?

1676
01:19:00,782 --> 01:19:03,118
Are--

1677
01:19:03,243 --> 01:19:04,661
Are you Anisha Carpenter?

1678
01:19:04,786 --> 01:19:06,830
Do I know you?

1679
01:19:08,207 --> 01:19:09,833
Charlie Logan.

1680
01:19:11,168 --> 01:19:13,670
Look, I know this is
going to sound crazy,

1681
01:19:13,795 --> 01:19:16,548
but you put a hex on me

1682
01:19:16,673 --> 01:19:17,674
so that
all my girlfriends

1683
01:19:17,799 --> 01:19:19,676
would fall in love
with other people,

1684
01:19:19,801 --> 01:19:21,470
and I need you...

1685
01:19:21,595 --> 01:19:22,971
to reverse the spell?

1686
01:19:27,476 --> 01:19:28,519
Woo! That--
That's your pendant.

1687
01:19:28,644 --> 01:19:29,937
You used to wear that!

1688
01:19:30,062 --> 01:19:31,480
You wore it
at the party

1689
01:19:31,605 --> 01:19:32,940
when you pulled out
my hair

1690
01:19:33,065 --> 01:19:34,691
and did the-- ahh--
with the thing.

1691
01:19:34,816 --> 01:19:36,193
And then you wanted
to see my penis,

1692
01:19:36,318 --> 01:19:37,402
and I said no.

1693
01:19:37,528 --> 01:19:39,404
Go to your room, Lila.
Lock the door.

1694
01:19:39,530 --> 01:19:40,697
But this is
just getting good.

1695
01:19:40,822 --> 01:19:41,865
Now.

1696
01:19:43,283 --> 01:19:45,494
I'm sorry.

1697
01:19:45,619 --> 01:19:47,496
What can I do

1698
01:19:47,621 --> 01:19:49,831
to convince you
to help me?

1699
01:20:08,141 --> 01:20:09,726
This spell--

1700
01:20:09,852 --> 01:20:11,728
turn it off, please.

1701
01:20:11,854 --> 01:20:13,522
Charlie,
I was just a kid.

1702
01:20:13,647 --> 01:20:14,731
I didn't know
what I was doing.

1703
01:20:14,857 --> 01:20:16,233
I don't even know
what I did.

1704
01:20:16,358 --> 01:20:17,734
You fucked up my life!

1705
01:20:17,860 --> 01:20:18,902
That's what you did.

1706
01:20:19,027 --> 01:20:20,737
I asked you
to watch your language.

1707
01:20:20,863 --> 01:20:22,948
Your room. Now.

1708
01:20:25,951 --> 01:20:27,995
Anisha,

1709
01:20:28,120 --> 01:20:31,123
I am begging you.

1710
01:20:31,248 --> 01:20:33,750
Have you ever wanted
someone so badly

1711
01:20:33,876 --> 01:20:35,919
that you would do anything
to get them?

1712
01:20:37,796 --> 01:20:39,965
If someone's
meant to be yours,

1713
01:20:40,090 --> 01:20:42,801
eventually
they will be.

1714
01:20:46,889 --> 01:20:48,765
No. Whoa. Wait. No!

1715
01:20:48,891 --> 01:20:50,726
If you think
that by me being here,

1716
01:20:50,851 --> 01:20:51,768
we're supposed
to get together--

1717
01:20:51,894 --> 01:20:54,938
I wasn't talking about you.

1718
01:20:56,523 --> 01:20:58,400
My husband Kurt.

1719
01:20:58,525 --> 01:21:00,944
Really, Charlie,
I was 10.

1720
01:21:01,069 --> 01:21:02,946
I may have thought
I was in love,

1721
01:21:03,071 --> 01:21:04,907
but I was also hot
for Scott Baio.

1722
01:21:06,575 --> 01:21:07,951
So--

1723
01:21:13,790 --> 01:21:16,627
I've blown it.

1724
01:21:17,586 --> 01:21:18,795
Well, then,

1725
01:21:18,921 --> 01:21:20,964
all you can do
is let her go.

1726
01:21:31,183 --> 01:21:33,185
Ha ha ha! Yeah, dude!

1727
01:21:33,310 --> 01:21:34,811
You're my hero!

1728
01:21:34,937 --> 01:21:37,314
Ha!

1729
01:21:37,439 --> 01:21:39,858
How was she?

1730
01:21:39,983 --> 01:21:41,068
Take me home.

1731
01:21:41,193 --> 01:21:43,904
I'm not that easy, man.

1732
01:21:44,029 --> 01:21:47,074
You're going to have to
take me to dinner first.

1733
01:21:47,199 --> 01:21:49,493
You little munchkin.

1734
01:21:49,618 --> 01:21:51,119
I have to set her free,

1735
01:21:51,245 --> 01:21:53,413
let Mother Nature
take its course.

1736
01:21:53,539 --> 01:21:55,165
If you love something,
set it free, right?

1737
01:21:56,959 --> 01:21:59,127
I think Cam is really
going to respond

1738
01:21:59,253 --> 01:22:00,462
to the new gay you,
Chuck.

1739
01:22:00,587 --> 01:22:02,798
Take me home.

1740
01:22:02,923 --> 01:22:04,424
I got a phone call to make.

1741
01:22:16,812 --> 01:22:19,439
Hi. I'm trying to find
Howard Blaine.

1742
01:22:19,565 --> 01:22:20,858
Hi, Howard.

1743
01:22:20,983 --> 01:22:22,860
Um, we've never met,

1744
01:22:22,985 --> 01:22:26,822
but I have a friend
that you really need to meet.

1745
01:22:28,740 --> 01:22:31,869
<i>♪ If I could start
all over with you again ♪</i>

1746
01:22:33,412 --> 01:22:34,788
Howard?

1747
01:22:34,913 --> 01:22:38,458
<i>♪ I'd change the way
the story ends ♪</i>

1748
01:22:38,584 --> 01:22:41,003
<i>♪ I'd try my best
to help you along ♪</i>

1749
01:22:41,128 --> 01:22:43,380
<i>♪ If ever
there's anything wrong ♪</i>

1750
01:22:43,505 --> 01:22:47,050
<i>♪ But I know
you got to be moving on ♪</i>

1751
01:22:49,136 --> 01:22:53,223
<i>♪ Baby, it's gonna be fine
if you have to go ♪</i>

1752
01:22:53,348 --> 01:22:56,935
<i>♪ And I'll always
wish you well, you know ♪</i>

1753
01:22:58,604 --> 01:23:00,981
<i>♪ It's time for you
to do everything ♪</i>

1754
01:23:01,106 --> 01:23:03,400
<i>♪ You always
wanted to do ♪</i>

1755
01:23:03,525 --> 01:23:06,862
<i>♪ So I'll see you
when you make it through ♪</i>

1756
01:23:08,739 --> 01:23:10,949
<i>♪ I couldn't
do anything right ♪</i>

1757
01:23:13,911 --> 01:23:15,621
<i>♪ I couldn't
do anything right ♪</i>

1758
01:23:15,746 --> 01:23:17,206
<i>♪ I was so far away ♪</i>

1759
01:23:17,331 --> 01:23:23,086
<i>♪ And you shut me outside ♪</i>

1760
01:23:23,212 --> 01:23:26,924
<i>♪ You shut me outside,
shut me outside ♪</i>

1761
01:23:30,511 --> 01:23:33,013
<i>♪ It's time for you
to do everything ♪</i>

1762
01:23:33,138 --> 01:23:35,265
<i>♪ You always
wanted to do ♪</i>

1763
01:23:35,390 --> 01:23:40,437
<i>♪ So I'll see you
when you make it through ♪</i>

1764
01:23:40,562 --> 01:23:44,149
<i>♪ Yeah, I'll see you
when you make it through ♪</i>

1765
01:23:52,074 --> 01:23:53,575
Eat me.

1766
01:23:53,700 --> 01:23:55,202
Eat me.

1767
01:23:55,327 --> 01:23:56,787
Gotcha.

1768
01:23:57,746 --> 01:23:58,956
<i>Watch out for the--</i>

1769
01:23:59,081 --> 01:24:00,165
Owned.

1770
01:24:01,375 --> 01:24:03,377
Owned.

1771
01:24:03,502 --> 01:24:05,128
[Stu]
I'm getting married!

1772
01:24:06,380 --> 01:24:09,216
Chuck! I found my dream girl,

1773
01:24:09,341 --> 01:24:11,969
and it's all because
of you I just proposed.

1774
01:24:12,094 --> 01:24:13,971
Lara, get your sweet ass
over here.

1775
01:24:14,096 --> 01:24:14,972
You remember Lara?

1776
01:24:17,140 --> 01:24:19,351
Lara stepped out of heaven--

1777
01:24:19,476 --> 01:24:20,352
Oh.

1778
01:24:20,477 --> 01:24:21,645
And into my office

1779
01:24:21,770 --> 01:24:23,856
to correct a condition.

1780
01:24:23,981 --> 01:24:25,148
She's got polymastia.

1781
01:24:26,275 --> 01:24:27,985
Has more than two boobs.

1782
01:24:28,110 --> 01:24:30,404
Isn't that perfect for me?
Show him.

1783
01:24:30,529 --> 01:24:31,405
No, no.

1784
01:24:31,530 --> 01:24:32,781
No, no, that's okay.

1785
01:24:32,906 --> 01:24:33,991
Really. I don't mind.

1786
01:24:34,116 --> 01:24:36,493
Yeah, I used to be
embarrassed about it,

1787
01:24:36,618 --> 01:24:38,370
but that was before
pookie pants here

1788
01:24:38,495 --> 01:24:40,789
made me realize
how special I am.

1789
01:24:40,914 --> 01:24:41,957
Oh, baby, you're
so goddamn special.

1790
01:24:42,082 --> 01:24:43,792
Oh, I love you, monkey pie.

1791
01:24:43,917 --> 01:24:45,127
- Okay, show him.
- Okay.

1792
01:24:48,380 --> 01:24:50,257
Is that or is that not

1793
01:24:50,382 --> 01:24:52,467
the most beautiful sight
you've ever seen in your life?

1794
01:24:52,593 --> 01:24:55,637
It's like seeing
the Grand Canyon
for the first time.

1795
01:24:55,762 --> 01:24:58,098
It's like seeing Earth
from space.

1796
01:24:58,223 --> 01:25:00,267
It's like <i>Three's Company,</i>

1797
01:25:00,392 --> 01:25:02,019
but all Chrissies,
you know what I'm saying?

1798
01:25:02,144 --> 01:25:03,020
I'm happy for you, buddy.

1799
01:25:04,605 --> 01:25:07,524
But, dude, that's not
why we came, okay?

1800
01:25:07,649 --> 01:25:10,986
Did you know that it smells
like shit in here?

1801
01:25:11,111 --> 01:25:12,863
You may want
to open a window.

1802
01:25:12,988 --> 01:25:14,323
It's making me
a little boop!

1803
01:25:14,448 --> 01:25:15,741
Okay, you tell him, baby.

1804
01:25:15,866 --> 01:25:17,034
Okay, so I'm friends
with Katie,

1805
01:25:17,159 --> 01:25:18,410
who knows Cam,

1806
01:25:18,535 --> 01:25:20,537
and she said that Cam
said she's leaving today

1807
01:25:20,662 --> 01:25:23,207
for Antarctica
with some penguin guru.

1808
01:25:26,752 --> 01:25:29,546
That's nice. I'm happy for her.

1809
01:25:33,217 --> 01:25:35,552
You sure as shit
don't look happy.

1810
01:25:35,677 --> 01:25:38,722
I loved something,
and I set her free.

1811
01:25:38,847 --> 01:25:40,557
She met somebody else.

1812
01:25:40,682 --> 01:25:43,644
But I set her free.
That's what's important.

1813
01:25:50,192 --> 01:25:52,236
She's leaving, buddy...

1814
01:25:53,612 --> 01:25:54,905
for Antarctica...

1815
01:25:56,198 --> 01:25:57,491
right now.

1816
01:25:57,616 --> 01:26:02,079
She is going.

1817
01:26:02,204 --> 01:26:06,083
[slowed-down voice]
She's going.

1818
01:26:06,208 --> 01:26:11,505
She's... leaving.

1819
01:26:11,630 --> 01:26:12,923
What the fuck am I doing?

1820
01:26:13,048 --> 01:26:14,091
That's
what we're saying!

1821
01:26:14,216 --> 01:26:17,052
Go! Go get your girl,
will you?

1822
01:26:17,177 --> 01:26:18,262
He's a little slow.

1823
01:26:21,098 --> 01:26:22,599
<i>♪ It's true ♪</i>

1824
01:26:22,724 --> 01:26:27,062
<i>♪ I don't believe a thing ♪</i>

1825
01:26:28,313 --> 01:26:33,193
<i>♪ Has she been
asking for me? ♪</i>

1826
01:26:33,318 --> 01:26:35,195
<i>♪ So hurry up, let's go ♪</i>

1827
01:26:35,320 --> 01:26:38,907
<i>♪ Don't want
to miss a thing ♪</i>

1828
01:26:42,327 --> 01:26:45,163
<i>♪ Come on ♪</i>

1829
01:26:45,289 --> 01:26:49,543
<i>♪ Love is all we got ♪</i>

1830
01:26:49,668 --> 01:26:50,627
Excuse me.

1831
01:26:50,752 --> 01:26:52,004
I'm sorry, guys.

1832
01:26:52,129 --> 01:26:53,964
Ma'am, excuse me.

1833
01:26:54,089 --> 01:26:56,133
Excuse me.

1834
01:26:56,258 --> 01:26:59,136
Has the flight
for Antarctica
boarded yet?

1835
01:26:59,261 --> 01:27:01,221
There are no
direct flights, sir.

1836
01:27:01,346 --> 01:27:02,514
Uh, connecting flight?

1837
01:27:02,639 --> 01:27:04,600
Which one? There are two.

1838
01:27:04,725 --> 01:27:06,018
Uh, has the flight

1839
01:27:06,143 --> 01:27:07,227
with a passenger
named Cam Wexler

1840
01:27:07,352 --> 01:27:08,645
boarded yet?

1841
01:27:08,770 --> 01:27:11,982
Sorry, sir. Can't give you
that information.

1842
01:27:12,107 --> 01:27:15,152
Sir, you won't be
able to go to the gate
without a ticket.

1843
01:27:15,277 --> 01:27:17,196
I have to get
to Antarctica,

1844
01:27:17,321 --> 01:27:20,407
so I will
take a ticket
for both planes.

1845
01:27:20,532 --> 01:27:24,036
There are only first class
tickets available, sir.

1846
01:27:24,161 --> 01:27:27,331
Of course there are.
I'll take them both.

1847
01:27:28,790 --> 01:27:30,584
Are you traveling
with any baggage?

1848
01:27:30,709 --> 01:27:31,960
No.

1849
01:27:32,085 --> 01:27:33,879
No.

1850
01:27:34,004 --> 01:27:36,173
You do realize
that it's -60 degrees there.

1851
01:27:36,298 --> 01:27:37,174
Yes.

1852
01:27:40,010 --> 01:27:42,346
And that'll be $17,412.

1853
01:27:49,269 --> 01:27:50,354
Just do it.

1854
01:27:54,483 --> 01:27:55,526
Here you go.

1855
01:28:02,866 --> 01:28:04,201
[beeping]

1856
01:28:04,326 --> 01:28:06,912
Shoes, belt, watch.

1857
01:28:07,037 --> 01:28:08,789
You've never been
to an airport, dummy?

1858
01:28:14,336 --> 01:28:16,213
[beeping]

1859
01:28:16,338 --> 01:28:17,506
What goes in pockets?

1860
01:28:17,631 --> 01:28:18,882
Uh, change.

1861
01:28:19,007 --> 01:28:21,009
Change. Change
goes in pockets.

1862
01:28:21,134 --> 01:28:21,969
Put it in
the little bucket.

1863
01:28:22,094 --> 01:28:23,428
Don't waste
my big bucket.

1864
01:28:23,554 --> 01:28:25,222
No. Small bucket!

1865
01:28:25,347 --> 01:28:26,515
I don't need it.

1866
01:28:26,640 --> 01:28:27,808
Want to make this quick?

1867
01:28:27,933 --> 01:28:29,226
I am in a real hurry.

1868
01:28:29,351 --> 01:28:30,477
Let's do this.
Take your pants off.

1869
01:28:30,602 --> 01:28:32,229
What?

1870
01:28:32,354 --> 01:28:34,398
You heard me.
Take your pants off.

1871
01:28:36,358 --> 01:28:38,402
I'm kidding you, weirdo.
Don't do that.

1872
01:28:38,527 --> 01:28:39,987
Why would you do that?

1873
01:28:40,112 --> 01:28:41,405
Come on, let's go.

1874
01:28:43,365 --> 01:28:45,617
Go, go, go.

1875
01:29:07,014 --> 01:29:08,056
Cam.

1876
01:29:09,391 --> 01:29:11,435
Wait! One more! Here.

1877
01:29:19,193 --> 01:29:20,444
I meant to do that.

1878
01:29:31,413 --> 01:29:32,289
Here.

1879
01:29:32,414 --> 01:29:33,457
Thanks.

1880
01:29:35,209 --> 01:29:36,251
Charlie?

1881
01:29:36,376 --> 01:29:38,754
I'm sorry.
Please don't be mad.

1882
01:29:38,879 --> 01:29:41,340
Antarctica? You couldn't have
just taken her to a movie?

1883
01:29:41,465 --> 01:29:42,716
Charlie--

1884
01:29:42,841 --> 01:29:45,135
Look, I know that it's
crazy that I'm here,

1885
01:29:45,260 --> 01:29:47,679
but it felt even crazier
not to come.

1886
01:29:47,804 --> 01:29:49,890
Excuse me. You have
to take your seats.

1887
01:29:50,015 --> 01:29:50,891
Charlie--

1888
01:29:51,016 --> 01:29:52,559
My entire life,

1889
01:29:52,684 --> 01:29:54,436
I've been nothing more
than a stepping-stone

1890
01:29:54,561 --> 01:29:56,188
to every relationship
I've ever been in.

1891
01:29:56,313 --> 01:29:59,358
There's always been a next guy
who's better than me.

1892
01:29:59,483 --> 01:30:03,111
For once in my life,
I want to be that next guy.

1893
01:30:06,490 --> 01:30:09,993
I've never said this
to anybody in my whole life.

1894
01:30:10,118 --> 01:30:11,245
Cam...

1895
01:30:14,915 --> 01:30:17,125
I love you.

1896
01:30:17,501 --> 01:30:18,710
I love you, Cam.

1897
01:30:21,088 --> 01:30:23,549
Please don't go.

1898
01:30:25,509 --> 01:30:28,762
Charlie, I'm coming back
on Wednesday.

1899
01:30:28,887 --> 01:30:30,222
What?

1900
01:30:30,347 --> 01:30:31,223
Yeah.

1901
01:30:31,348 --> 01:30:32,349
But Howard and--

1902
01:30:32,474 --> 01:30:36,019
Have you met
Howard's wife Marilyn?

1903
01:30:36,144 --> 01:30:38,355
Howard's wife?
Mm-hmm.

1904
01:30:38,480 --> 01:30:39,815
Howard's wife.

1905
01:30:39,940 --> 01:30:40,941
Hi.

1906
01:30:41,066 --> 01:30:42,401
Hi, Howard's wife.

1907
01:30:42,526 --> 01:30:43,569
Howard's wife.

1908
01:30:43,694 --> 01:30:46,363
I know about your call
to Howard.

1909
01:30:46,488 --> 01:30:48,240
I knew
you wanted to meet him.

1910
01:30:48,365 --> 01:30:50,242
I knew it would
make you happy.

1911
01:30:50,367 --> 01:30:52,369
I swear that's all
I've ever wanted to do.

1912
01:30:52,494 --> 01:30:55,330
Plus, mate selection
is up to the female.

1913
01:30:57,583 --> 01:30:59,376
But, Charlie,
you've been acting so--

1914
01:30:59,501 --> 01:31:01,170
I know, I know.
Idiotic, nuts.

1915
01:31:01,295 --> 01:31:03,589
And no more lucky charm
excuse.

1916
01:31:03,714 --> 01:31:06,675
I'm done thinking
about the past
and what could be.

1917
01:31:06,800 --> 01:31:09,595
All I care about now
is what is.

1918
01:31:09,720 --> 01:31:12,055
And this--

1919
01:31:12,181 --> 01:31:14,558
This is.

1920
01:31:17,769 --> 01:31:19,396
<i>[Flight attendant over P.A.]
Ladies and gentlemen,</i>

1921
01:31:19,521 --> 01:31:21,064
<i>we are about to close
the cabin doors.</i>

1922
01:31:21,190 --> 01:31:22,191
<i>Please take your seats.</i>

1923
01:31:25,194 --> 01:31:26,403
That's for you.

1924
01:31:26,528 --> 01:31:27,946
Here.

1925
01:31:48,342 --> 01:31:49,551
Charlie!

1926
01:31:59,436 --> 01:32:00,938
Excuse me, are you
that guy who--

1927
01:32:01,063 --> 01:32:02,189
He isn't anymore.

1928
01:32:17,162 --> 01:32:19,790
<i>♪ Lucky ♪</i>

1929
01:32:19,915 --> 01:32:22,918
<i>♪ Now you're
right in front of me ♪</i>

1930
01:32:23,043 --> 01:32:26,380
<i>♪ Like a bolt
of lightning, you ♪</i>

1931
01:32:26,505 --> 01:32:30,634
<i>♪ Chase the stones away ♪</i>

1932
01:32:30,759 --> 01:32:33,220
<i>♪ Rainbows ♪</i>

1933
01:32:33,345 --> 01:32:36,515
<i>♪ Though you never
really know ♪</i>

1934
01:32:36,640 --> 01:32:39,977
<i>♪ Sometimes
they come to you ♪</i>

1935
01:32:40,102 --> 01:32:44,022
<i>♪ Love is so adaptive ♪</i>

1936
01:32:44,147 --> 01:32:46,859
<i>♪ Yes ♪</i>
Oh!

1937
01:32:46,984 --> 01:32:50,237
<i>♪ You're gonna get lucky ♪</i>

1938
01:32:50,362 --> 01:32:54,575
<i>♪ You're gonna get lucky now ♪</i>

1939
01:32:54,700 --> 01:32:57,786
<i>♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh ♪</i>

1940
01:33:02,249 --> 01:33:03,667
Excuse me.

1941
01:33:18,557 --> 01:33:21,185
Giggle monkey,
what are you looking for?

1942
01:33:21,310 --> 01:33:22,519
Sex tapes.

1943
01:33:22,644 --> 01:33:24,980
What is the point
in house sitting

1944
01:33:25,105 --> 01:33:26,648
if you can't scope out

1945
01:33:26,773 --> 01:33:29,151
some good old-fashioned
homemade porn!

1946
01:33:29,276 --> 01:33:31,820
Score!
You're a genius.

1947
01:33:33,906 --> 01:33:35,240
Okay.

1948
01:33:35,365 --> 01:33:36,158
<i>[Charlie]
Hold on.</i>

1949
01:33:44,124 --> 01:33:46,001
<i>Do it. Do it. Oh, yeah.</i>

1950
01:33:46,126 --> 01:33:47,002
<i>Babe.</i>

1951
01:33:47,127 --> 01:33:48,545
<i>Yeah, what?</i>

1952
01:33:48,670 --> 01:33:49,755
<i>Oh, you like that.</i>

1953
01:33:49,880 --> 01:33:51,757
<i>You like when I do
stuff with the--</i>

1954
01:33:51,882 --> 01:33:54,092
<i>All right. I'll do it
for just one last time.</i>

1955
01:33:54,218 --> 01:33:55,093
<i>This is it.</i>

1956
01:33:55,219 --> 01:33:56,386
<i>Okay.</i>

1957
01:33:56,512 --> 01:33:57,638
<i>Because I'm not
into bestiality,</i>

1958
01:33:57,763 --> 01:33:59,223
<i>and you know that.
That's documented.</i>

1959
01:33:59,348 --> 01:34:00,599
<i>No, I know. It's fake.</i>

1960
01:34:00,724 --> 01:34:01,600
<i>All right.</i>

1961
01:34:01,725 --> 01:34:02,601
<i>But it's hot.</i>

1962
01:34:02,726 --> 01:34:03,602
<i>Okay.</i>

1963
01:34:03,727 --> 01:34:06,188
<i>Hey. So, uh...</i>

1964
01:34:06,313 --> 01:34:07,564
<i>so do you want to--</i>

1965
01:34:07,689 --> 01:34:09,149
<i>You come to this
glacier often?</i>

1966
01:34:09,274 --> 01:34:10,400
<i>[Cam giggles]</i>

1967
01:34:10,526 --> 01:34:12,152
<i>I'm really interested
in you</i>

1968
01:34:12,277 --> 01:34:13,779
<i>because you're a Gentoo soul.</i>

1969
01:34:13,904 --> 01:34:14,863
<i>Ha ha ha.</i>

1970
01:34:14,988 --> 01:34:16,573
<i>Mmm. You like that?</i>

1971
01:34:16,698 --> 01:34:18,617
<i>Yeah, I like that.
Do it faster.</i>

1972
01:34:18,742 --> 01:34:20,953
<i>You like...
when I do that?</i>

1973
01:34:21,078 --> 01:34:22,204
<i>Mm-hmm.</i>

1974
01:34:22,329 --> 01:34:24,206
<i>You ever seen me
go down on a--</i>

1975
01:34:24,331 --> 01:34:25,374
<i>Shh. It's okay.
No, no.</i>

1976
01:34:25,499 --> 01:34:26,792
<i>Baby, baby, don't worry.</i>

1977
01:34:26,917 --> 01:34:28,669
<i>Ah... ah...</i>

1978
01:34:28,794 --> 01:34:30,128
<i>Yeah, I like that.</i>

1979
01:34:34,716 --> 01:34:35,843
<i>[giggling]</i>

1980
01:34:35,968 --> 01:34:37,261
<i>You like that,
don't you?</i>

1981
01:34:37,386 --> 01:34:38,262
<i>Yeah.
Shh.</i>

1982
01:34:38,387 --> 01:34:39,471
<i>Oh, that's so hot.</i>

1983
01:34:39,596 --> 01:34:41,598
<i>Shh. No more "Uhh."
No more "Uhh."</i>

1984
01:34:41,723 --> 01:34:43,058
<i>Uhh...</i>

1985
01:34:43,183 --> 01:34:44,560
<i>Mm-hmm.</i>

1986
01:34:44,685 --> 01:34:46,353
<i>Do it. Yeah.</i>

1987
01:34:46,478 --> 01:34:47,354
<i>Oh, yeah.</i>

1988
01:34:47,479 --> 01:34:48,355
<i>[grunting]</i>

1989
01:34:48,480 --> 01:34:51,567
<i>That's really good.</i>

1990
01:34:51,692 --> 01:34:53,026
<i>Okay,
now do the other thing.</i>

1991
01:34:53,151 --> 01:34:54,152
<i>Do the other thing.</i>

1992
01:34:54,278 --> 01:34:55,654
<i>[growling]</i>

1993
01:34:55,779 --> 01:34:57,489
<i>Yeah! Whoo!</i>

1994
01:34:57,614 --> 01:34:59,491
<i>Look at me. Here's
really what you like.</i>

1995
01:34:59,616 --> 01:35:01,535
<i>Yeah,
you know what I like.</i>

1996
01:35:01,660 --> 01:35:04,997
<i>Oh, yeah. Oh, I'm really
getting in the mood now.</i>

1997
01:35:05,122 --> 01:35:07,082
<i>You like when I eat
your penguin ass?</i>

1998
01:35:07,207 --> 01:35:09,376
<i>Yeah. Baby,
I think I'm ready.</i>

1999
01:35:09,501 --> 01:35:10,627
<i>[growling]</i>

2000
01:35:10,752 --> 01:35:14,214
Turn it off, baby.

2001
01:35:14,339 --> 01:35:15,841
[video stops]

2002
01:35:15,966 --> 01:35:17,009
You still in the mood?

2003
01:35:17,134 --> 01:35:18,010
Yeah.

2004
01:35:18,135 --> 01:35:19,094
All right.

2005
01:35:19,219 --> 01:35:20,470
<i>♪ [rock]</i>

2006
01:35:28,145 --> 01:35:30,105
<i>♪ I found the switch ♪</i>

2007
01:35:30,230 --> 01:35:32,149
<i>♪ Turned it on ♪</i>

2008
01:35:32,274 --> 01:35:34,109
<i>♪ I hit the ditch ♪</i>

2009
01:35:34,234 --> 01:35:36,195
<i>♪ You carried on ♪</i>

2010
01:35:36,320 --> 01:35:38,238
<i>♪ I was so near ♪</i>

2011
01:35:38,363 --> 01:35:40,240
<i>♪ Now you're so far ♪</i>

2012
01:35:40,365 --> 01:35:42,367
<i>♪ Are you quite sure ♪</i>

2013
01:35:42,492 --> 01:35:43,744
<i>♪ Just who you are? ♪</i>

2014
01:35:43,869 --> 01:35:45,746
<i>♪ Oh, I, ah-ah, I, I ♪</i>

2015
01:35:45,871 --> 01:35:48,790
<i>♪ Oh, you could
choose a friend ♪</i>

2016
01:35:48,916 --> 01:35:51,960
<i>♪ But you don't seem
to have the time ♪</i>

2017
01:35:52,085 --> 01:35:56,173
<i>♪ Oh, and I, ah-ah, I,
I wonder ♪</i>

2018
01:35:56,298 --> 01:36:00,385
<i>♪ If you ever get to say
what's on your mind ♪</i>

2019
01:36:00,511 --> 01:36:03,931
<i>♪ Oh, take a little time ♪</i>

2020
01:36:04,056 --> 01:36:08,602
<i>♪ Come on,
take a little time ♪</i>

2021
01:36:08,727 --> 01:36:12,648
<i>♪ I love it when you call,
I love it when you call ♪</i>

2022
01:36:12,773 --> 01:36:14,858
<i>♪ I love it when you call ♪</i>

2023
01:36:16,902 --> 01:36:18,779
<i>♪ See,
what's the complication? ♪</i>

2024
01:36:18,904 --> 01:36:20,781
<i>♪ It's only conversation ♪</i>

2025
01:36:20,906 --> 01:36:22,783
<i>♪ I love it when you call ♪</i>

2026
01:36:24,910 --> 01:36:26,078
<i>♪ Whoa, whoa ♪</i>

2027
01:36:26,203 --> 01:36:28,288
<i>♪ He loves it
when you call ♪</i>

2028
01:36:28,413 --> 01:36:30,666
<i>♪ He loves it
when you call ♪</i>

2029
01:36:33,043 --> 01:36:37,047
<i>♪ Yeah, I wonder
where you've been ♪</i>

2030
01:36:37,172 --> 01:36:40,843
<i>♪ Yeah, and I wonder
who you've seen ♪</i>

2031
01:36:40,968 --> 01:36:45,055
<i>♪ And I hope
you find your train ♪</i>

2032
01:36:45,180 --> 01:36:46,807
<i>♪ When you do a living ♪</i>

2033
01:36:46,932 --> 01:36:50,018
<i>♪ And hope
it's all it seems ♪</i>

2034
01:36:50,143 --> 01:36:53,647
<i>♪ I love it when you call,
I love it when you call ♪</i>

2035
01:36:53,772 --> 01:36:55,899
<i>♪ I love it when you call ♪</i>

2036
01:36:57,943 --> 01:36:59,653
<i>♪ See,
what's the complication? ♪</i>

2037
01:36:59,778 --> 01:37:01,905
<i>♪ It's only conversation ♪</i>

2038
01:37:02,030 --> 01:37:03,740
<i>♪ I love it when you call ♪</i>

2039
01:37:05,534 --> 01:37:06,785
<i>♪ Whew ♪</i>

2040
01:37:06,910 --> 01:37:07,953
<i>♪ [instrumental]</i>

2041
01:37:20,174 --> 01:37:21,925
<i>[song fades]</i>

2042
01:37:36,231 --> 01:37:39,693
<i>♪ I have been preparing,
preparing for this day ♪</i>

2043
01:37:39,818 --> 01:37:43,280
<i>♪ Don't plan on sleeping,
just eagerly await ♪</i>

2044
01:37:43,405 --> 01:37:46,867
<i>♪ It seems misleading,
such a far-off stretch ♪</i>

2045
01:37:46,992 --> 01:37:50,662
<i>♪ But I mean
every word I say ♪</i>

2046
01:37:50,787 --> 01:37:53,498
<i>♪ When we're so down ♪</i>

2047
01:37:53,624 --> 01:37:57,961
<i>♪ All the details
spill out ♪</i>

2048
01:37:58,086 --> 01:38:01,089
<i>♪ It's no accident ♪</i>

2049
01:38:01,215 --> 01:38:05,093
<i>♪ How you fell
right into my arms ♪</i>

2050
01:38:05,219 --> 01:38:08,388
<i>♪ It's no accident ♪</i>

2051
01:38:08,514 --> 01:38:12,059
<i>♪ How you fell
right into my arms ♪</i>

2052
01:38:12,184 --> 01:38:13,894
<i>♪ Leave with me,
leave with me ♪</i>

2053
01:38:14,019 --> 01:38:15,938
<i>♪ Leave with me,
leave with me ♪</i>

2054
01:38:16,063 --> 01:38:19,107
<i>♪ Leave with me now
forever again ♪</i>

2055
01:38:19,233 --> 01:38:20,984
<i>♪ Leave with me,
leave with me ♪</i>

2056
01:38:21,109 --> 01:38:22,903
<i>♪ Leave with me,
leave with me ♪</i>

2057
01:38:23,028 --> 01:38:28,909
<i>♪ Leave with me now
forever again ♪</i>

2058
01:38:29,034 --> 01:38:31,787
<i>♪ Again ♪</i>

2059
01:38:33,038 --> 01:38:36,708
<i>♪ Something tells me I am ♪</i>

2060
01:38:36,834 --> 01:38:40,295
<i>♪ Losin' self-control ♪</i>

2061
01:38:40,420 --> 01:38:43,674
<i>♪ Something tells me I am ♪</i>

2062
01:38:43,799 --> 01:38:47,302
<i>♪ Losin' self-control ♪</i>

2063
01:38:47,427 --> 01:38:50,931
<i>♪ 'Cause you're
the only one who ♪</i>

2064
01:38:51,056 --> 01:38:54,434
<i>♪ One needs to know ♪</i>

2065
01:38:54,560 --> 01:38:56,228
<i>♪ Oh, leave with me,
leave with me ♪</i>

2066
01:38:56,353 --> 01:38:57,938
<i>♪ Leave with me,
leave with me ♪</i>

2067
01:38:58,063 --> 01:39:01,775
<i>♪ Leave with me now
forever again ♪</i>

2068
01:39:01,900 --> 01:39:03,443
<i>♪ Leave with me,
leave with me ♪</i>

2069
01:39:03,569 --> 01:39:04,945
<i>♪ Leave with me,
leave with me ♪</i>

2070
01:39:05,070 --> 01:39:09,700
<i>♪ Leave with me now
forever again ♪</i>

2071
01:39:09,825 --> 01:39:12,619
Closed-Captioned By
J.R. Media Services, Inc.
Burbank, CA